The most important desire of a woman. A woman's desire...

Today we are discussing the desire of a woman and not even just desires, but the sexual desires of women, or rather, the possible causes of this condition.

We will touch upon the topics: why sexual desire suddenly disappears and what to do about it, how to return sexual desire, a way out of the problem, the absence of sexual desire for the cause.

There is no sexual desire - what to do?

A little backstory. Gatherings in the kitchen sometimes reveal very difficult problems in the life of each of us. This is how, talking about joys and sorrows, the topic that our guest has complete lack of sexual desire. To our question - how is it? got the answer - ah, that's it! Well no desire to have sex, no feeling of arousal, moreover, absolutely I don't want to have sex with my husband, no, he is a wonderful person and I have the most tender feelings for him - but sex has become a duty, in bed my husband is indifferent to the feeling that you live with a log.

For the first time it became quiet in our kitchen, we thought and just started to remember what situations each of us had in life when the desire to have sex disappeared.

It turned out that everyone sometimes had such situations, but in order for a woman to have a complete lack of sexual desire, they heard about it for the first time. I recalled the once heard question, what to do to make a woman want to have sex, another question is about the fact that sometimes a woman does not have a desire to have sex, but about the lack of sexual desire in a woman - no.

Therefore, somehow by itself, a laptop appeared on our table and we began to look for answers to questions. No - of course we understand that it would be right for our friend to visit a specialist, which she promised to do, but our interest in this issue was too strong and therefore ...

What is sexual desire, or rather the sexual desires of women?

It turned out that this concept is closely related to such concepts as libido And sex drive, and since libido or sexual desire implies the presence of desire and desire for sex in women and men. sexual desire should be in every healthy person after reaching a certain age and moreover, the formation of sexual desire begins in childhood, consists of several stages before we reach full sexual maturity.

After a quick acquaintance with a variety of information on this topic, it turned out that:

  • Almost forty percent of women and men periodically have problems of a different nature in the intimate sphere.
  • Why don't I feel aroused - this question worries more women than men
  • A woman does not like to tell men that they feel a lack of sexual arousal, about their expectations or problems in bed.
  • No sexual desire is the reason - sometimes such problems occur as a result of certain physiological disorders.
  • in different materials, you can often read that, according to statistics, every third woman has never experienced a wave of sensations and emotions that covers her during an orgasm. But as soon as she feels an orgasm to the fullest at least once in her life, she will want it all the time.
  • It cannot be said that there is only one reason for the disappearance of sexual desire, this is due to the fault of many specific reasons.
  • Sexual desire is reduced when taking contraceptives, because the ovaries are at rest and hormones remain at the same level every day.
  • A decrease in sexual desire in women can be associated with both psychological and physiological problems.
  • Sexual desires also depend on the partner, but you cannot blame only the man for the decrease or lack of desire in women.
  • Many problems associated with sexual desire can be solved on your own, but in some cases you will need the help of a specialist.
  • A set of physical exercises that stimulate an increase in blood flow to the pelvic organs and genitals, contribute to an increase in libido, for example, aerobics, yoga, Pilates.
  • A decrease in libido or a temporary lack of sexual desire in a woman is not always a bad thing. Nature thus limits reproductive functions when "not the time." The wrong person is with you, the wrong condition (after childbirth or any serious illness). But sometimes a physiological decrease can turn into a pathological one.
  • Women, like children, need more time to sleep than men, so they can safely throw in an hour of another sleep, then they will have an excellent libido.
  • Most often, sexual desire falls for several reasons at once, therefore, according to experts, an integrated approach to assessing this condition is necessary.
  • Hormones such as estrogen and testosterone play an important role in a woman's lack of sexual desire. But not only them.
  • Each woman has her own sexual constitution (it can be objectively determined) and, accordingly, her own needs. It is possible to assess individual potential and correlate it with the current state in just one appointment with a specialist.

At the beginning of a relationship, when a man and a woman enter the stage of intimacy, their sex drive can be strong. But the emergence of problems in this area is possible when a certain period of time passes, and the passion between partners begins to subside, it is at this moment that sexual desire is set at a certain level. In cases where such a formed level satisfies both partners, then there are no causes of the disorder.

However, it is also possible that a man or woman has a feeling of less need for sex, and a complete loss of interest in intimate relationships is also possible. In cases where there is a lack of sexual desire in a woman, this, as a rule, greatly offends the pride of a man. It is necessary to dwell on those factors that can cause such a decrease in sexual desire.

Why can there be a problem with sexual desire in women?

As mentioned above, all the reasons that lead to a weakening of the desire for sexual intimacy can be divided into two groups - physiological factors and psychological:

Decreased sex drive due to hormones

  • The physiological factor in reducing sexual desire in a woman is a violation of the hormonal balance in a woman's body

The male sex hormone, testosterone, is responsible for libido in both men and women. Unfortunately, recently there has been a tendency to reduce it earlier than the established norm, that is, before 30 years. Also, the hormone prolactin may be to blame for the decrease in sexual desire in women (however, in men too). In women, a weakening of libido is observed in the postpartum period, when she breastfeeds the baby.

Decreased sex drive due to age

  • Physiological factor of a decrease in sexual desire in a woman - age-related changes in a woman

Fading or complete lack of sexual desire in a woman observed in premenopausal (climacteric) and menopausal age. It is known that during these periods of life, ovarian function begins to fade, which is manifested in low estrogen production.

Sexual intercourse becomes unpleasant and even painful, which is associated with a decrease in the production of lubrication in the vagina. Many women at this age completely refuse sexual life, and do not experience any psychological and physical discomfort because of this.

Decreased sex drive due to illness

  • The physiological factor in reducing sexual desire in a woman is the presence of general and / or gynecological diseases

Diabetes mellitus, pathology of the cardiovascular and urinary excretory systems, inflammatory diseases of the pelvic organs, etc. are often the cause of sexual coldness in women.

Decreased sex drive due to bad habits

  • The physiological factor in reducing sexual desire in a woman - various bad habits

Smoking, alcohol abuse, drug addiction suppress sexual desire. Bad habits inhibit nerve impulses in the part of the brain that is responsible for sexual desire and arousal. In the first place comes the enjoyment of these addictions.

Decreased sex drive due to spasms

  • The physiological factor in reducing sexual desire in a woman is vaginismus

Vaginismus is an involuntary spastic contraction of the muscles of the vagina, which is very painful not only for a woman, but also for a man (during intercourse). The cause of vaginismus can be experienced sexual violence, sexual harassment, and so on.

Decreased sex drive due to infections

  • Physiological factor of lack of sexual desire - various sexual infections

As you know, genital infections cause discomfort in the vulva and vagina. Sexual contact against the background of severe colpitis is not only unpleasant, but also very painful, this is also the reason that there is a lack of sexual desire in a woman.

Decreased sex drive due to psychological reasons

  • The psychological reasons for a decrease in sexual desire in a woman are very diverse.

These can be chronic stress, fatigue, discord in relations with a partner, a quarrel with him, an inappropriate environment, a partner’s unwillingness to take into account the needs and preferences of a woman, and much more.

In addition, a decrease in sexual desire in women may be associated with religious education, complexes, or any upheavals in sexual life.

Often a partner does not want to take into account the desires and capabilities of a woman, and does not take into account the fact that, in addition to her main job, she has to do household chores, raise children, cook lunches and dinners. One of the reasons for the decrease or lack of libido in young women is inexperience and fear of unwanted pregnancy.

How is a woman's lack of sexual desire treated?

It is important to understand here that the treatment of the symptoms of this type of disorder is inseparable from the elimination of its causes. So if the cause is diabetes, then focus on managing your diabetes and improving your overall quality of life. Other therapeutic methods include taking antidepressants, homeopathy, psychotherapy.

But, if you face the truth, it is worth recognizing that the treatment of low desire is impossible only by medication. It should be complex (medication and restoration of the emotional state through a psychological mood), including in some cases even the active participation of a partner.

Treatment of sexual disharmony

In the treatment of sexual disharmony, sleep disturbances, headaches, irritability, breast tenderness, vaginal discharge, weight gain, waist enlargement, as well as acne, increased skin oiliness are possible. With the inclusion of additional hormonal therapy, an increase in hair growth is noted.

Do not deny this problem at the slightest sign of its occurrence, otherwise it can lead to serious discord in life. The key to successful restoration of harmony is mutual understanding and mutual respect in a couple. Many experts recommend practicing relationships for some time without direct sexual contact, which can diversify and bring novelty into intimate life, so that later the desire to resume it in a full form will wake up.

And if everything is not so much running for you ... i.e. If you decide that you are ready to do something to return sexual desire, then a few simple ways will help you on the path to returning the joy of sex.

Work on awakening sensuality and restore sexual desire

You need to learn how to enjoy yourself! And first of all, take care not of sexual pleasure, but of the sensitivity of the organs of perception: touch, smell, hearing.

The ability to enjoy simple things like beautiful music or the scent of your favorite perfume will help increase your libido. Turn on your favorite music, sit comfortably and try to feel every note of this melody. "Dissolve" in every sound, forgetting about all the problems and troubles.

In addition, such aroma or music therapy will help you relax and tune in to sex. It will be easier for you to awaken your sexual desire and get more pleasure from intimate caresses.

Your body is beautiful, so love your body and it will love you back with passion

Very often, problems with libido arise when a woman is dissatisfied with the way she looks: her figure, hairstyle, facial features ... Especially many problems are created by dissatisfaction with her own weight.

Learning to feel more sexy and desirable will help an ordinary mirror. Try to look at your reflection as often as possible, study your body, learn to emphasize your strengths and hide your flaws.

Remember: men love different women - someone likes blondes more, and someone likes redheads, someone prefers thin women, and someone likes women "in the body."

You are an individual! And it is with you that a man is ready to have sex every day! There is no other like you in this world, and therefore you have something to be proud of. You are the one and only! Love yourself for who you are, and you will learn how to get the most out of life.

Use sexual tricks for your body, it deserves it

Sexologists say that a great way to increase sexual desire is ... a longer foreplay. Explain to your partner that you need a little more sexual contact than usual before intercourse.

Increase the time of sexual foreplay by 2-3 times. In this case, it will be useful to resort to the help of all kinds of sexual toys. This will not only increase your sexual desire, but also diversify sex. Do not forget about lubricants - these gels make up for the lack of lubrication, and also often contain additional components that stimulate desire.

It is also known that women who have regular sex life rarely face the problem of lack of desire. Therefore, do not forget to make time for sex in your busy work schedule!

It is necessary to raise the vitality and at the same time the sexual desire of a woman will rise

Physical activity has been clinically proven to markedly increase sexual desire. Significantly increase libido: 30-minute daily walk, jogging, swimming or any other type of physical activity. But at the same time, the regularity of muscle loads is important! Training only once a week will not give the expected results.

You can pay attention to individual muscle groups that are directly responsible for sexual pleasure. The famous Kegel exercises are ideal for training intimate muscles. They can be performed at any time of the day and anywhere - even on the way to work. Every day for a few minutes, contract the muscles of the entrance of the vagina - and after a few days you will feel the result.

Correct hormonal imbalance and improve your sex life under the supervision of a doctor

Problems in sexual life also appear after hormonal disruptions in a woman's body. In this case, the only correct way out is hormonal therapy. This method of "treatment" is necessary for women who have recently given birth to a baby, breastfeeding mothers and women going through menopause. Also, hormonal failure can occur after severe stress.

In all these cases, in the body of the fairer sex, there is a lack of the hormone testosterone (less than 10 nanograms per milliliter of blood), estrogen and pheromones. Only a specialist can prescribe the necessary hormonal preparations. Remember that these medical drugs must be taken strictly in accordance with the dosage. Otherwise, it is possible that not only the sexual life will worsen, but also the general well-being.

Eat right and with pleasure, increasing sexual desire

It has long been known that proper nutrition can solve many problems, including those of an intimate nature. Aphrodisiac products will help increase libido.

Sexual fire is effectively awakened by spicy foods and various spices: pepper, onion, garlic, ginger, cinnamon, fennel, cardamom, anise, turmeric, horseradish. Famous aphrodisiacs include seafood: halibut, salmon, clams, oysters. They increase sexual desire due to the fatty acids they contain.

Few people know that many of the products familiar to us are powerful erogenous stimulants. These include: chocolate (especially dark), bananas, avocados, mangoes, figs, nuts, liver, eggs.

Traditional medicine believes it can stimulate sexual desire in women

No less often, medicinal herbs are used in the treatment of sexual dysfunctions. The most famous natural herbs that stimulate sexual desire include:

  • wild yam,
  • ginseng,
  • damiana,
  • aloe,
  • celery.

These herbs can be used in various combinations in the form of decoctions and infusions, as well as seasonings for various dishes. It is also good to do inhalations based on these herbs, and some - for example, aloe - can even be consumed in its pure form (aloe juice with honey). These herbs are also found in many dietary supplements designed to increase sexual desire.

Talking about the problem of decreased libido - does not allow it to deepen

One of the most common reasons for a decrease in libido in a woman is psychological in nature - problems in relationships with a partner. Quarrels, conflicts, omissions, suspicions destroy sexual life in 80% of cases. And the woman suffers first. The only way out is a heart-to-heart talk. Tell your man about your suspicions and doubts.

The sooner you solve all the painful issues, the sooner you will feel the joy of sex again. In some cases, you may need the help of a psychologist or family therapist. Do not hesitate to seek help from a specialist - after all, not only your sexual pleasure, but also your future relationship with a partner may depend on this.

Fantasize with a man, such fantasies increase a woman's sexual desire

Try to be as honest with your man as possible. Communication will help increase libido. Talk to your partner about everything, and most importantly - about your sexual desires and fantasies. Arrange an evening of revelations and talk to each other on the most intimate topics. It is best if this conversation flows smoothly into the night of magical love.

Try to make each other's fantasies come true. This method of increasing libido is often prescribed by experts. And this is absolutely justified - after all, the inability to talk about your sexual desires first causes sexual dissatisfaction, a decrease in sexual activity, and then a complete lack of desire for intimacy.

Do not forget about the romance of life, bring an erotic component into relationships and you will increase a woman's sexual desire

In the daily hustle and bustle, we often forget or just don't find time for romance in a relationship. But an evening spent by candlelight to the sounds of slow and pleasant music in the company of your soulmate can solve many problems ... Such an environment primarily affects the emotional relationship between partners. You will learn to understand each other better, pay more attention to feelings - yours and your partner's.

Such intimate evenings cannot but affect your sexual desire. Romance will increase your sensuality and teach you to understand each other's desires without words. Arrange such intimate evenings at least once a month. Integral attributes of a romantic rendezvous should be not only music and candles, but also a properly set table. Give preference to dishes from aphrodisiacs and light wine (in small quantities).

A small dictionary for an article on the lack of sexual desire in women

  • Orgasm- these are muscle contractions of the vagina and uterus that occur during intercourse and bring physical and moral satisfaction. A woman during one sexual intercourse can experience both single and multiple orgasms.
  • vaginismus- this is an involuntary spastic contraction of the muscles of the vagina.
  • Frigidity- this is the sexual coldness of a woman. It can manifest itself in a decrease in sexual desire up to a lack of desire for sexual intimacy or even aversion to sex. Allocate physiological and psychological frigidity, as well as imaginary and true.
  • Libido represents nothing more than sexual desire, the desire for sexual relations. It is believed that libido fully blooms in women after 20-22 years.
  • Wish- a special state of the human psyche, reflecting the qualitative component of his needs. Desires are feasible and impossible, strong and weak, regular and one-time, explicit and secretive ... but every person has them and is at every moment of his life, including sleep.
  • Aphrodisiacs- Substances that stimulate or enhance sexual desire or sexual activity.

What does a woman want?
Alas! No one knows.
Sometimes she doesn't even know.
Of course, to love, to wish,
For someone to go crazy over her.

To admire the appearance at a meeting
And they saw off for a long time looking after,
So that the day is not difficult and the evening is long
And so that the face hides how many years.

So that at night a handsome man
He squeezed her in his arms.
And very gentle, very romantic
He reminded her of the feminine essence.

To get up shamelessly happy in the morning
And washing away sweet laziness under the shower,
Like yourself beautiful and,
Smiling to face the new day.

Today I want to tell you as a spirit about what a woman wants. The idea that a woman wants love is not for everyone. Some ladies have enough respect and care. Not always these concepts are companions of love. Despite this, few people refuse love either. Although...

I know one girl who gave up her love for a poor student for the sake of wealth. Their love seemed fabulous to everyone, but she chose money.

I will not dissemble, to the question of what a woman wants, you can answer - money. If you are told that money is not the main thing, then you are simply being deceived. Not a single sane person, even if it is a woman, will not refuse money if they themselves flow into her hands. I admit that not everyone will do something to get a rich heir, but that she will not refuse, especially if she loves him - that's for sure!

There is a category of women who want to make a career. By the way, money plays an important role here. It is unlikely that you will find an altruist who wants to climb the career ladder just to satisfy her ambitions. Most of the careerists receive satisfaction not only from the process of work, but also from the results of the result of their activities - the receipt of material benefits.

Do not think that women are so materialistic that they are only interested in money. There is something else that a woman wants. I mean a woman in the full sense of the word, and not a woman as a female by gender. The woman wants a family. Friendly, strong, reliable. In this family, the main place is given to children. It's no secret that a man plays an important role in a woman's life. But somehow it so happened that a single woman gives birth to children. Instinct sooner or later wins the mind. And a woman can go to great lengths for her family. Let there be no permanent man in her.

But what to hide, living with her beloved children, a woman wants a man. And each one draws her own ideal in her thoughts. What kind of man do women not want to see next to them? An infantile sissy, lying all day on the couch, putting all household chores on the shoulders of a woman, unwilling to make any decisions, an irresponsible miser. They do not like ladies and boring types.

There is one more thing a woman wants. And practically any. By all means, change your figure. Thin ones want to get better, plump ones want to lose weight ... And even those who, according to others, are all right, also want to correct something. Either enlarge the chest, or pump up the press. A woman who does not want to change anything in her appearance is either in a terrible depression, or ... Let's leave the ellipsis here.

Contrary to popular belief that women want diamonds, I can assure you that this is not the case. Not every woman is a fan of expensive jewelry. Many ladies prefer jewelry. And some do not like to “decorate” themselves with something other than clothes. And so a gift in the form of diamonds can lead a lady to despair.

Is it possible to say in one word what a woman wants? Quite. A woman wants HAPPINESS! And each happiness is associated with something different. Someone is happy that he got rid of the annoying second half, someone from the fact that he found this soul mate. Women are generally unpredictable people. Today we want to go fishing, tomorrow we want to pick mushrooms, and the day after tomorrow we want to jump with a parachute. And we want someone to fulfill these desires of ours. And oddly enough, everything comes back to the man and his money. What can be the conclusion? What does a woman want? Kind and considerate, and, most importantly, a loving man, indulging our whims, with good money. Yes, yes, it all comes down to this ... And then we will have children, and diamonds, and plastic surgery, and fitness clubs, and much, much, much that we want today and want tomorrow ...

The inner essence of female inconsistency

There was a revealing scene in a recent movie where a man asks his girlfriend what women want. And she reveals to him a terrible secret, which, according to her, should never be divulged. Leaning towards him, she confesses in a whisper - “We ourselves have no idea what we want!”

This, of course, is not entirely true. Women are quite aware of what they want. If you ask the right questions, it is easy to bring to the surface the set of requirements and wishes that a woman would like to present to a man.

But every joke has its share of jokes. With all the transparency and obviousness of women's desires, behind them lies a deeper and more complex motivation, in which a rare woman is aware of.

But before continuing, I must make a small disclaimer. The article "Why does a man need a family?" went viral on the internet and sparked a lot of controversy. Several times I have seen men say that the article was written by a frenzied feminist who hates men. But women like this article.

This is because it is always more pleasant to discuss the shortcomings of another person. Women like to read about men's troubles, just like men like to discuss women's troubles.

This article is about women and is written for women. But I am aware that it will interest men much more, and in some women it will cause a sharp rejection. Well, there's nothing you can do. But still, dear women, I hope for your interest and sobriety of your perception.

The article deals with the general case of a woman with a violation of self-esteem, and the terms "pride" and "insignificance" do not carry an emotional connotation.

So, if you cover the entire list of women's "I want" at once, then it is easy to notice their inconsistency. Remembering the article about husbands and lovers, we can say that a woman expects from a man the simultaneous manifestation of both models of behavior, which, by definition, is impossible. No living man can cover the entire list of women's requirements. At best, only half of it.

But neither men nor women realize this. Every woman is looking for a magical prince who will embody all the traits and properties that she needs. And men, not understanding what is happening, break themselves for the sake of a woman or rebel against demands to change. But the outcome is always the same - relationships that, perhaps, began as a fairy tale and a gift of fate, are destroyed.

A woman does not understand her own inconsistency and cannot give up her desires. She is more likely to blame her man for not loving her enough to change. But even if a man indulges her desires, then this does not suit her either. A woman no longer needs a subordinate man, and then a new round of accusations begins - now in weakness. Until the relationship falls apart.

The theme of the inconsistency of the female character deserves all the books that have been written about it. The mystery of the female soul is an eternal question for both halves of humanity. Let's try to figure out what's going on here.

The origin of women's demands

For centuries, marriage for a woman was quite a pragmatic step. By giving herself to a man, a woman shifted the responsibility for her survival and well-being onto him. It was considered the norm and consistently cultivated from generation to generation.

Parents themselves were looking for a successful, from their point of view, party for their daughters. After all, if a son could get on his feet and provide for the old age of his parents, then nothing like this could be expected from daughters.

In social life, a woman for a long time had only a "subordinate" value. Therefore, parents tried to marry their daughter as soon as possible with the maximum benefit for themselves. Thus, they took care of her off their shoulders, and with due luck, they gladly used her female attractiveness as a chance to intermarry with a richer and more influential family.

From the point of view of the woman herself, there was nothing humiliating in this situation. Marriage was a transaction in which a woman received material and social benefits in exchange for the right to own herself. Love, respect and affection could participate in this, but they were never a mandatory attribute.

But with the advent of new times, when relations between a man and a woman began to rely more and more on the principle of mutual pleasure, and a woman gained and approved the right to her full social independence, the institution of marriage found itself in an interesting situation.

The criterion for choosing a marriage partner was "love" - ​​an ephemeral complex of emotional experiences, which is now placed above all reasonable arguments. And although no one really knows what this “love” is, it is given such importance that a relationship without love already seems to be something unthinkable. Marriage of convenience, which has always been a normal and natural phenomenon, is now condemned as materialistic and insensitive.

Men and women play "relationships" and believe that great and bright love is the main reason for marriage. And men in this delusion are even more sincere, because under the mask of innocence in the female subcortex, the ancient motive clearly sounds: "A man is a means of solving all problems."

This thought may be conscious or suppressed, but, in any case, it seems quite natural to a woman. - Why else do you need a man?

The old marriage of convenience was a much more honest enterprise than today's love marriages, which hide all the calculation under the veneer of emotional attachment. "Darling, do you love me? Great, then you owe me ... ”- this is the inner essence of modern marriage from a female position.

Many factors are involved in the formation of such a point of view, but, mainly, it is a matter of education. From mother to daughter, from generation to generation, this principle of using a man for his own purposes is passed on to every woman.

However, not everything here depends on the parents, because the power of social pressure is already great enough to introduce the virus of female self-conceit into the emerging psyche.

Television series, reality shows, "authoritative" glossy magazines and other means of social suggestion teach girls from an early age how to attract a man, how to tie him to her and how to use him later. Coquetry is a martial art of manipulating men, which is included in the compulsory female education program.

In addition, every girl, so that she does not shirk from supporting the general "conspiracy", is introduced the destructive idea that the inability to attract and marry a man is a sign of her poor quality. And it all ends with the fact that a woman's self-esteem completely becomes dependent on her attractiveness to men. Please note this is extremely important.

Here we smoothly move into the plane of the psychological needs of a woman, the responsibility for the implementation of which, she also shifts to a man. Now, on top of everything else, he must behave in such a way that the woman ceases to feel her inferiority. And if he doesn't, he's to blame.

This is the stumbling block that destroys most families. A woman is trying to get out of a state of internal conflict at the expense of a man. But since he cannot play contradictory roles, a woman, sooner or later, feels that a man is missing something from her.

She herself does not quite understand what exactly she needs, but this does not prevent her from blaming a man for poor quality and demanding that he solve a well-known fairy-tale problem - go there, I don’t know where, bring something, I don’t know what.

Meanwhile, the responsibility for creating this problem and for its solution lies solely with the woman. A man, at best, can help her understand what is happening.

Women's pendulum of pride and insignificance

We have already talked about the problem of pride and insignificance in the article on the structure of social relations. I hope you read it, otherwise, some turns of further narrative may seem incomprehensible to you.

Self-esteem in men and women is more or less the same. Both those and others are talking about two poles that require their strengthening. Pride is recouped through active interaction with the outside world - in comparing oneself with other people, in the struggle for power, in victories over rivals. And insignificance or self-pity feeds on inner experiences, through mutual emotional support or self-consolation.

Everyone wants victories in the social sphere and unconditional acceptance in the spiritual sphere. And the difference between men and women is only in what means are used to achieve inner peace.

Men, in this regard, are more self-sufficient - they may well cope with internal conflict on their own - for example, through a career, hobbies and male friendships. A woman, on the other hand, is in a state of dependence - in order to calm her inner anxiety, she needs relationships with men. Without men, a woman is not able to overcome her sense of inferiority.

Probably, such female dependence is not an innate predestination, but refers to the results of social conditioning. But the depth and energy charge of this program is so great that in terms of the scale of its manifestations it is quite comparable with psychological instincts. There is a chance to go beyond the program, but this path is thorny and dangerous.

And as long as a woman follows this imperative embedded in her, she will play with men in two opposite directions, which create the external effect of the contradictory and incomprehensible nature of her desires.

Women's pride

This side of the game forces a woman to choose a man who will give her a certain status. A man should be a winner, a leader, a typical "lover". When a woman manages to attract such a man, she receives confirmation of her own importance and calms down for a while.

The main means of attracting "cool" men is sexuality. A woman challenges men, offering to fight for her favor, and then peacefully gives herself to the winner. But even then, a woman continues to test a man for strength, provoking him to show strength - a kind of test of aptitude. If the man is stronger, the test is passed, if not, it's time to look for a replacement.

There is also a downside. Along with the fact that a woman wants to see a strong man next to her and be defeated by him, she herself wants to defeat him. Having chosen the most "cool" man among others and having achieved his attention, the woman soon begins to subordinate him to herself.

In fact, a woman seeks to completely and solely take possession of a man - his attention, his time, his actions, his desires, his soul. This is where many family conflicts come from, when a wife demands from her husband to leave his friends for her, to advance in a career for the sake of fulfilling her desires, to share her values, to accept her inner world, and so on.

Using the terminology from the article about male behaviors, a woman tries to retrain her “lover” into a “husband”. A man may or may not give in to this pressure, but if a woman is not aware of her game, the relationship will be destroyed anyway.

If a man refuses to obey, a woman will feel that she is not loved and appreciated enough, fall into a sense of self-pity and begin to look for a man who will accept and love her. If a man submits to her will, the woman will feel stronger, which means she will lose support for her pride in him. And now she will have to look again for a “tough man” who will amuse her pride with his attention.

In both cases, the problem of pride is resolved only for a short time, when the woman still retains hope that she will be able to remake the man, or until she is faced with the fact that the remade and defeated man no longer attracts her.

But even in this short period, a woman does not feel happy, because the satisfaction of pride is only one of the poles of the self-esteem pendulum.

female nonentity

The second pole of the pendulum makes a woman look for a different type of relationship. The spiritual qualities of the chosen one come to the fore here - the ability to empathize, constancy, fidelity, caring, predictability, and the like. A responsible duty is assigned to such a man - to love a woman.

In a relationship with a "lover" there is passion, admiration, playfulness, and for some time these feelings are enough to believe in mutual love. But the intensity and heat of these emotions means that they burn out as quickly as they arise. There is no eternal love that every woman dreams of.

A lover creates a sense of self-worth in a woman, makes her feel his sexual attractiveness, but he cannot penetrate into her soul and calm her inner anxiety. Yes, he is not interested in this - he does not care about the experiences of a woman, since he is completely focused on himself.

Therefore, having played enough relationships with "cool men", a woman sooner or later begins to pay attention to another type of men - those who are willing to immerse themselves in her inner world, understand her, accept and love her.

The lover says to the woman - "You are amazing!" Husband says - "You are good!"

At the pole of insignificance, a woman wants to get from a man exactly the feeling that with all her shortcomings and despite all the mistakes she has made, she remains good and beloved for him. Receiving such recognition from a man, a woman can calm down and come to terms with herself for a while.

When they say that every woman wants to love and be loved, we are talking about just this kind of infantile-romantic relationship. Beautiful courtship, chivalrous behavior, serenades under the window, passionate declarations of love - all this creates a feeling of inner peace in a woman. “They love me, so I’m good.”

In addition, the relationship with the "husband" gives a woman the opportunity to strengthen her rear, feel safe and start to build a nest. The predictability and subordination of a man to the desires of a woman (“I will do everything for your love!”) Create a feeling of stability and security in a woman. A man becomes that safe haven where a woman returns to lick her wounds after clashes with the outside world.

This is how women imagine the ideal husband. He must love a woman, take care of her, fulfill her whims, pity and comfort her, and, in general, be at her full disposal. But, as in the case of the pride pole, there is also a downside.

First, receiving from a man all the signs of love that you can think of, a woman still remains unsatisfied. At first it seems to her that she is in a fairy tale, but soon, the unconditional love of a man and the willingness to look into his mouth, slowly begins to annoy her. The relationship between a man and a woman suddenly turns into a relationship between mother and child.

The man completely loses his independence and submits to the woman. As a result, he loses all authority in the eyes of a woman, which means that his opinion can no longer be taken for granted. Now his exhortations “You are good” lose their magical power and do not bring their former peace. A woman is deprived of the emotional support for which she entered into a relationship with this man.

Secondly, relationships with a “husband”, which imply mutual fidelity and love to the grave, deprive a woman of the moral right to win back her pride with other men. This means that the pole of pride is not protected and does not allow the woman to calm down completely. The blame for this failure, in her eyes, lies entirely with the man.

A woman loses all respect for her chosen one, treats him, accuses him of the years of his life spent on him in vain, demands strength and responsibility from him, but thereby only aggravates the situation. A man loses all free will, and a woman again finds herself with nothing - both poles of her mutilated self-esteem are again tearing her soul apart.

Reconciliation of the poles

As it should have become clear, a woman needs to simultaneously protect both poles of self-esteem. Ideally, it should be a man who combines all thirty-three pleasures - a husband and a lover in one person. But, in practice, this is impossible. A man, like a woman, is rigidly locked within the framework of the game into which he has been plunged by social education.

Therefore, a woman has two choices - to come to terms with her misfortune or look for some kind of surrogate options. The more severe her moral upbringing, the more likely she is to choose misfortune. On the other hand, women with more moral flexibility find a way out of their predicament through relationships with many men.

It can be the most obvious option - husband at home and lover on the side - or more streamlined options. In general, it is not necessary for a woman to have sexual relations with a man in order to win back her pride with him. It is enough for her to feel that a man who is authoritative for her highly appreciates her.

For example, the role of a pseudo-lover is often played by a high boss at work. A woman can show off her professional knowledge and skills in front of him or openly flirt with him, not allowing her to dissolve her hands. In both cases, the woman receives the male recognition she needs.

Another amusing example is the relationship of a woman with her psychologist. A man in such a relationship is obviously endowed with great authority, and therefore his opinion acquires special significance for a woman. The problem of sexual relations between a psychologist and a patient is based precisely on this mechanism - a woman really wants to win an authoritative man and she deliberately provokes him with her coquetry.

In addition, you need to understand that a woman can include many men in her game at the same time. The role of the husband is likely to be played by one man, but there may be several lovers. One will confirm her feminine attractiveness, the other will appreciate her professional qualities, the third will admire her intelligence, and so on. And all this can do without real sexual contact.

Actually, this is usually how it turns out - getting a thread from the world is easier than finding one lover who will give everything at once. In addition, this approach saves a woman from moral torment at the expense of her infidelity. Each individual man on her list falls short of the role of a full-fledged lover, which means that there is no formal betrayal of one man for the sake of another. Just a light soothing flirtation.

There is another important point in this whole situation. By carefully distributing roles in her male retinue, a woman achieves a high degree of inner peace, but still remains not completely happy. For complete satisfaction, a woman needs to reconcile both poles with each other, because only in this way can she achieve inner integrity and get rid of the last moral torment.

To do this, a woman seeks to make friends with all her men and finally calms down only when she succeeds. After all, when there is no conflict between her “husband” and her “lover”, she finds herself in a sweet state - she no longer needs to rush from one pole to another - she finally has “everything at once”.

Exit the vicious circle

Although a woman can reset her inner conflict through relationships with men, you need to understand that this is only a crutch - a very high quality one, but still a crutch. An ugly support that exposes the mutilation of the female soul.

A woman rarely manages to stabilize her life situation and pick up a set of men that will bring her complete peace. But even when she succeeds, the situation cannot be considered stable, because her state of mind remains dependent on men. As soon as one of them disappears, her entire fairy-tale world will collapse into dust.

Even having calmed her inner conflict, a woman is in constant fear, due to the fact that happiness can end at any moment. Therefore, we can say that a woman is simply doomed to suffering of one kind or another ... until she gives up playing pride and insignificance.

Exiting the game is an extremely painful procedure. After all, the main survival mechanism for a woman is put under attack - relations with a man. Plus, you need to remember the social pressure that a woman will have to overcome in order to completely change her behavior patterns. Relatives, girlfriends, husbands and lovers - all will insist on continuing the game.

The description of specific steps to overcome internal conflict and change attitudes towards a man is far beyond the scope of this article. In addition, this is a strictly individual matter, so the question remains for you to study on your own or to work on consultations.

In the meantime, for the umpteenth time, I wish all readers and female readers to be honest with themselves and those people who are dear to you. The only way to happiness is to overcome the internal conflict, and not to look for circumstances that will allow you to forget about it.

First, consider the question: "What kind of man does a woman need?". You will find the answer to this question by clarifying for yourself some rules of behavior with women. Always strive to adhere to the important rule of dominance in relationships with girls. This does not mean the manifestation of despotism. Dominance implies male initiative, confidence and steadfastness.

How to know if a girl likes you?

Each person decides for himself with whom to get acquainted, communicate, meet, etc. In this choice, criteria such as interests, upbringing, spiritual or material values, and maybe both, play the main role. But when it comes to choosing a sexual partner, appearance comes first. Seeing a lovely person, sexual fantasies immediately wind up, which is completely natural. Only after sex with a girl and a heart-to-heart conversation do all the other criteria listed above come into force.

The answer to the question: "What kind of man does a woman need?" will be incomplete if you do not highlight important aspects of the psychology of women. So, we all know how contradictory a woman's nature can be. How to correctly interpret its forms of denial or consent? Often female inconsistency is due to male misunderstanding. Men, reasoning, include logic, and women's logic is based on thoughts coming from the heart and soul. If a woman says no to you, it doesn't always mean no, especially since you've kissed and hugged before. Simply, you have not yet brought it to the desired condition. Your haste and excessive insistence may be the main reasons for her final refusal. You can unravel the female logic. Listen not to your passion, but to her breathing, to the frequency of her heartbeat. As the girl’s body gradually becomes limp, becomes more pliable, do not immediately go into her panties, caress her ears with gentle and pleasant words, continue to caress her neck with your lips, sniff her hair while your hands glide over her thallus and hips. Further, either clinging tightly to her chest, or loosening your hugs, make forward movements with your pelvis, as if imitating sexual intercourse, etc. Every woman tries to look decent in the eyes of a man, so they should not, like prostitutes, immediately spread their legs at the first opportunity. They want to be pursued, not coerced. At least out of respect for women, show how you are trying to achieve it not by the pressure of reckless passion, which comes, so far, only from you, but by consistent perseverance. As you build a house - brick by brick, inflame a woman's passion for yourself consistently, methodically - this is the art of seduction and seduction, which is worth learning. Women feel by your behavior, necessary and timely words addressed to them, how much you are in demand in the women's circle. Accordingly, for most of them it will be a huge compliment to be seduced by you.

Women's complexes, just like men's complexes, can be the main cause of failures and, consequently, disappointments in relationships with a loved one. For example, if a woman, in your opinion, hides her feelings for you in every possible way, tries not to flaunt her emotions, this is a manifestation of her female complexes that arose as a result of past unsuccessful relationships. The female soul is very vulnerable and the wounds inflicted by a misunderstanding of a former loved one heal for a long time, thereby plunging it, for example, into a local complex of distrust towards men. I think every woman dreams of meeting a man in her life who would understand and feel her in all emotional states. And then all heart wounds will disappear without a trace, and the world no longer seems so gloomy and boring.

All men know the fact that women are very greedy for compliments. Therefore, compliments to girls can and should be done. According to women, there are not many of them. But they especially appreciate, nevertheless, timely compliments, original, relevant and more like the truth. Unlike male directness, it is common for women to voice their innermost desires in the ambiguous form of female allusions. Sometimes so covertly, indirectly, as by the way and casually, that a man who does not know the psychology of women, in general, such female hints will be elusive. For example, if she complains to you about how she has gained weight, after which she certainly and momentarily wants to hear a categorical refutation from you. The more emotional and convincing this refutation sounds from the lips of a man, the more the girl will appreciate this compliment. It can be phrased something like this: “Why are you talking about yourself? I just wanted to tell you that you are at the peak of your heyday and look especially beautiful today. This is true. A radiant aura emanates from you, which makes you want to love even more and enjoy life."

The psychology of women is such that, in addition to all other "troubles", they tend to doubt. In the end, they just need to "break down", give them the opportunity to persuade themselves. The best cure for this is masculine confidence and delicate perseverance. Women are very flattered by such masculine qualities.

It will not be superfluous to note that foreplay is important for women, both in communication and in sex. Kissing is very important to them. They just love kissing. For some "persons" kissing is akin to sexual intercourse. So draw your own conclusions. At first glance, this is a small but significant detail, especially at the initial stage of a relationship. Do not neglect this.

If you really like a girl and your heart begins to beat faster and stronger in her presence, do not waste time and opportunity. How to show attention to girls and at the same time not creep in front of them is not the topic of this article. Let's talk about the ways and varieties of manifestation of female signs of attention to a man. Not every man is able to notice those same female signs of attention, and if he notices, he cannot understand what kind of character they are - either a woman shows sexual attraction or flirts with you to arouse jealousy in another man. And a bunch of all sorts of assumptions and conjectures you can weave in your head. If you know, understand and correctly interpret women's hints, and most importantly on time, then the result will not be long in coming. A timely response to female signs of attention, this is an understanding, which in turn brings future sexual partners closer together.

There are many varieties of manifestation of both female sexual desire and male. Women's are very different from men's. We note just a few of them:

Verbal method of influence (verbal) - for example, to hint, ambiguously,

Non-verbal (facial expressions, gestures, intonation, tone of voice, timbre),

Kinesthetic (supposedly random touches to the interlocutor),

Visual contact with the girl (an open long look into the eyes of the interlocutor),

Body language. This method is described in the article "Body Language".

Here is an example:

A woman, passing by you, may ask "what time is it" and, supposedly, without seeing the arrows on the dial, take you by the wrist.

Or on a first date, sitting with you at a table in a cafe, "accidentally" reach out your hand at the same time as yours to take a napkin and also "accidentally" touch your hands. Or you are sitting at the workplace, not bothering anyone, as a pretty employee approaches you with some question, maybe even quite insignificant, while leaning towards the monitor with curiosity, trying to see something in it, and your gaze inadvertently falls on her chest . And if the blouse bulges a little more, which, in principle, was provided by the girl, then your attention to it will rise to the limit. And you no longer think about work, a picture of a half-naked female breast froze before your eyes, and sexual fantasies climb over the edge. After such attacks on her part, the girl is waiting for a response from you. And if your reaction meets her expectations or, even better, exceeds her expectations, then passion will flare up with lightning speed.

In general, the effect of surprise is very exciting for women, provided that this was preceded by visual contact, or any other of the above, which would motivate her delight and justify your reciprocal impulse. Remember, a girl will not deign to "accidentally" touch someone who would not be interested in her. In this regard, they are very careful.

All attempts to violate your personal space are due to her attention to you. Telling something very secret, she approached your ear to whisper. If she didn't, ask her to do so, citing poor hearing due to crowding. And now, this is another type of contact - olfactory.

If a man is persistent, he will definitely achieve what a woman wants.

Now I will tell you something that you are unlikely to read in any psychological literature or in any pamphlets containing advice from a woman for women. After 30 years of studying the human psyche, Sigmund Freud said that the only question he could not find an answer to - What does a woman want? I will try to answer him.

A woman wants a man who CONTROLS the situation, himself, his emotions, other people, her ... controls his REALITY, which he shares with her.

Now read it again. This is the unwritten rule that has existed in the world for centuries, those words in which women are unlikely to admit - even to themselves. But subconsciously, women, especially beautiful and feminine, dream of meeting just such a man. However, they DESPECT unreliable men who give them whatever they want, and comments such as "Oh, I only need this guy to buy the trinkets I need" or "He's nice to go somewhere, but he I'm already tired of it. He knows that I love another, "very often you can hear in women's conversations. A man who gives too much to a woman becomes sexually uninteresting to her. I am sure you will agree with this obvious fact.

The most attractive women are used to the fact that in THEIR REALITY men literally creep in front of them, and, as a result, they do not get what they need from men, and begin to behave disrespectfully and rudely. Once again I will say: this is their reality. They are not averse to receiving from men the benefits that they offer them, but their main problem is that they themselves do not need these men, because they do not receive the most necessary thing from them - CONTROL.

Men often behave like “litters” under slender female legs, because they are afraid that a woman will be offended and leave them, BUT, at the same time, by their behavior they make parting with a woman MORE likely. This is one of those paradoxes that are absolutely beyond our intuition. Centuries, millennia pass, and things are still there. Most men every time a woman behaves like a naughty child, they think: "I, perhaps, will tolerate all her antics, even the meanest ones. I have to put up with this, otherwise she will leave me." And these men go through ten lives before they realize (if they ever do) that women's strongest magnets are self-confidence, self-respect, composure, indifference, and control.

How not to face this problem? Very simple in theory and much more difficult in practice. Below I give a one hundred percent recipe that will attract as many women to you as you wish. And more. And more on top. It consists of 14 items:

Stop groveling before a woman! Behave like a CHOOSER, NOT a CHOSEN!

Learn to respond quickly to her antics and punish her for her faults!

Learn to say to a woman the most magical and powerful word: NO!

Know how to get away from a woman if you can't make her respect you!

Sarcastically and, at the same time, friendly, play on her weak points, make comments to her, notice the imperfection in her "perfection"!

DO NOT show yourself hungry for her attention, for her body!

Look NOT at how good she is, but at how she treats you!

Be interested in her inner world much more than the outside!

Never be ashamed of your desires and DO NOT apologize for them!

Do NOT try to shift decision making or responsibility to other people!

Don't take failure personally. Draw conclusions and learn from your own mistakes!

When developing a relationship, NEVER make a woman the center of your life!

Think about the possible WIN, not about the possible loss!

Be different in the BETTER way from other men!

Read this list again. If you have visited the pages of this site, then I am sure that you have something to work on. See which of the lines of behavior I have listed are more characteristic of you, which are less. Of course, it is necessary to focus on the latter and develop them. Just do not deceive yourself by saying that these changes in you will happen in you quickly. Trust me, it's unrealistic. In order to REALLY change, it takes at least a few years. And, moreover, hard work. After all, even in order to stay in place, you need to run as fast as possible. You also need to determine for yourself the rhythm of your work - otherwise you will waste a lot of time in vain.

In order to make it easier for you to embark on the difficult path of your own learning and development, I will give on this page a SUPER-EFFICIENT formula for success, borrowed by me from martial arts:

1. Clearly define the goal you want to achieve.

2. Take action that you are sure will create a real opportunity for your desires to come true.

3. From your own mistakes and successes, highlight which actions lead to the desired result, and which move you away from it.

4. Flexibly change your behavior until you reach your desired goal.

Another little tip. Write these four points on a piece of paper and hang them in a prominent place in your room. It probably won't hurt you, but it can help a lot. In difficult times, these lines will help you much more than posters depicting long-haired musicians, shiny cars or "silicone" girls.

The changes that will happen in you if you start communicating with women in a DIFFERENT way will be of interest not only to women. They will allow you not only to achieve her body, but also to win her favor, the desire to communicate, meet and bring you joy. You will also learn how to better control and find ways out of difficult situations that you will face.

If you still do not believe me, then go to a nearby supermarket, go up to the most beautiful woman and show her the lines from this article. Ask her to tell me if my words are true, in their opinion. If you are a skeptic, then you will probably be surprised by the answers you will hear. I've asked many beautiful women about these ideas and virtually EVERYONE has told me that they are absolutely accurate.

And again, as you work on yourself to become irresistible to women, you need to remember how important it is NOT TO TAKE FAILURE TO HEART. Instead, you can always analyze what you did wrong so that you do NOT repeat the same mistakes in the future. (For more effective analysis, you can use a voice recorder). Almost all the most successful people in the world found their success IMMEDIATELY AFTER THE TOTAL FAILURE, at a moment in which most mere mortals give up. Therefore, always remember that you are just learning, developing, and failure is just a tiny step on a long path to the ultimate goal.

Before I begin to introduce you to some of the basics of marketing, I want to shed light on one more intuitive question. You will surely come across those women who will never want to treat you with respect. And it may not be your fault at all - some women simply hate men, some actively try to solve their personal or material problems at their expense. Whatever the reasons, if you can't get a woman to respect you, you should be able to say "No!" and leave, otherwise you will exhaust your entire nervous system, and in the end you will be left with nothing. John F. Kennedy said, "Only he who is brave enough to lose can win." Most young men become uninteresting to women because they repeat the same mistake. They look at how beautiful their chosen one is, what a wonderful character she has, how well she kisses, etc. instead of paying attention to how SHE IS TREATING THEM. Such behavior on the part of a man destroys relationships in the blink of an eye. You see, the reality is that even the most positive people at their core have a hidden need to wipe their feet on those people who openly allow them to do so. And yet, in this world, women will NEVER be sexually attracted to a man who becomes their toy. You must have repeatedly heard the statement from women: "I dream of finding a man stronger than me." And bitchy women scream about it the loudest. You see, any woman longs to meet a man who will take her under his wing and control all her irresponsible behavior, who will take responsibility for ensuring her safety and comfort. I believe you now realize the importance of the following words:

IT DOES NOT MATTER HOW BEAUTIFUL IT IS. IT DOES NOT MATTER WHAT SHE SAYS. IT IS IMPORTANT HOW SHE TREATS YOU!

A woman has secret desires in different areas. She is also interested in relationships with a man, and the peculiarities of life and the presence of some things in her wardrobe, travel, gifts, and she also wants to try something that was previously inaccessible.

Dreams come from childhood

Many girls wanted to be princesses. And it was a huge image that was preserved in my memory: a beautiful dress, expensive jewelry and the most magical ball in the world. Of course, a ball gown today may not be appropriate, but an adult woman still wants to someday be not just beautiful, but unforgettable. To make the dress perfect, the jewelry is incomparable, and the evening spent in this image remained in my memory forever. Let it be a trip to the most luxurious restaurant or a visit to the opera, it is important that admiring glances are given not only by the companion, but also by everyone around. Being a queen is a dream, and I want it to come true for at least one evening.

It is very important to fulfill the desire not on your own, but to receive it as a gift. After all, doing everything yourself is not at all interesting.

The desire to be saved is also from childhood. I want someone to protect, someone to make it clear that you can’t even touch with a finger, that you can’t offend even with a glance. How is such a defender lacking at work, when the boss scolds, or when mom scolds for an unfulfilled promise. I want protection when the driver honks on the road, when they are rude on the street or in other public places. The feeling of security is a subconscious dream, and I want it to be realized not once, but constantly.

forbidden dreams

People today live in an abundance of prohibitions. You can't be fat, you can't be poor, you can't even leave the house without makeup. And so I want to break these rules, to do something contrary to the system. Not everyone decides on such an act, but how you want to steal candy in a hypermarket. Or run a red light. Or show up to work in a super short mini and huge cleavage. I want to break the rules that put pressure on me. And sometimes just send everyone and be left alone.

Forbidden dreams are not meant to be fulfilled. They simply excite the imagination, give fantasies some piquancy.

Of the forbidden desires, there are sexual fantasies. Every woman has something that excites her, but she will not dare to embody it. It could be sex with two men. Or even rape, when he takes her by force, delivering unprecedented pleasure. Fantasy may be associated with a restriction of movement or proximity to a completely unfamiliar handsome man.

traditional dreams

Almost every woman loves to travel. If you ask what she would like to see, she will definitely tell. Someone dreams of snowy peaks, someone dreams of deserts. There are people who want to visit Paris or New York. To be in the place that I have seen so often in the photo is the dream of many, but not everyone believes that this is possible.

For some modern women, the dream of relaxation is relevant. Not about the active and bright, but about the usual. After working days, I want to stretch out on the couch, relax and sleep for a few days. At the same time, do not remember about worries: do not cook, do not deal with children, do not run somewhere on business. I want to forget about everything that is happening for a few days and take care of myself. Baths, massages, light dinners that appear by themselves. In an active rhythm, it is almost impossible to be alone, and even more so to turn off the phone. But many women dream about it for a long time.

Related videos

Tip 2: How to make your wildest sexual fantasies come true

Indecent sexual fantasies are often a taboo subject that even partners do not always discuss among themselves. But if thoughts about unfulfilled desires become too intrusive, you should not leave them in the category of unrealizable. Think about how you can make them a reality.

You will need

  • - Internet;
  • - props;
  • - intimate toys

Instruction

Deal with your erotic fantasies by trying to see them realistically. If you see something interesting in a porn movie, remember that it will not always be as exciting in reality. For example, one of the most common fantasies of both women and men involves group sex. On the screen, these scenes may look easy and harmonious, but in reality, a woman may be hard or hurt, and a man simply may not have enough strength. Evaluate in detail how you plan to realize such a fantasy. If nothing bothers you - proceed with the implementation.

Discuss intimate moments with your partner. Your job is to figure out how far he/she is willing to go. It is quite possible that you do not even suspect what is going on in the head of a loved one, what thoughts and desires occupy him. Drop prejudice, you will probably be surprised that the person with whom you share the bed is ready to go much further than you always thought. A number of non-standard intimate activities, such as anal sex or fisting, may seem unnatural to a woman just because she is stereotyped and sure that she will not like it. Persuade her to try just a little, and it is possible that your partner will discover new intimate horizons for herself. If your sexual fantasies clearly contradict the relationship in a couple, you must decide for yourself what is more important for you - the realization of desires or the trust of a partner.

Find like-minded people. Rest assured, in reality there will be much more of them than it seems at first glance. Start by reading relevant forums on the internet. First, just look at the participants, because among them there may be many who just came to have fun and are not going to show themselves in any way in real life. Gradually, you will surely find interesting links or contacts of like-minded people with whom you can realize your wildest sexual fantasies. Throw away excess modesty and do not be afraid to say what you want. You can meet on your way adequate and experienced partners who will open up new facets of intimate life for you.

Related videos

note

If you plan to fulfill desires with unfamiliar people, take care of your safety. Be guided by common sense, even if emotions and instincts come to the fore.

Helpful advice

Prepare everything you need to start realizing your fantasy. Take care of the place where you will do it. If you need props, such as role-play items or sex toys, please purchase them in advance.

Upbringing often does not allow girls to show their sexual addictions as openly as guys do. But if a girl trusts her lover, she will frankly fantasize about sex and, of course, bring her fantasies to life.

In order for a girl not to be shy about her sexual preferences, she must trust her partner. Otherwise, if there is no trust, sex will be boring and, which also happens, rare. Therefore, in order to make a girl more intimately relaxed and make her voice her sexual desires, you need to earn her trust.

How to make a girl think about sex

The simplest, but no less effective way is to pour out the girl's soul. As practice shows, if a guy shares his experiences, vivid memories from childhood and, not without it, vulgar thoughts, the girl opens her inner world in response. It is important not to rush things and gain confidence gradually. And remember: if she sleeps with you, this does not mean that she completely trusts you. Such girls are illogical.

Start a serious conversation. But without pressure and reproaches. Just tell her what you would like to try in bed. And, of course, take an interest in her fantasies. If she answers that she has never fantasized about such depraved topics, agree that she will certainly think about what she would like to try new, and share her thoughts with you. Do not forget to limit the time, otherwise she can think for ages. The best option is to give her no more than a couple of days to think, and, believe me, she will really think about this topic.

Create the right atmosphere

Have her watch an erotic movie, like Nine and a Half Weeks. And from erotica, you can move on to films with more explicit sex scenes. And don't forget to ask which of your friend's favorite parts of the movie.

And, of course, give the girl gifts "with a hint." Lace underwear is the best option. You can even invite your loved one to choose a costume for role-playing games, fur handcuffs, or a deluxe edition of the Kama Sutra. The abundance of gift options depends only on the degree of closeness of your relationship. Remember, a week after meeting, making a girl happy with an encyclopedia of love and sex will be superfluous, but a lace peignoir may be very appropriate.

Soft approach, openness, sincerity and the right gifts, and very soon she will make you happy with her most outspoken fantasies. You will only have to realize her dreams together in practice and get untold pleasure from it.

Not the first generation, the male half of the planet reflects on the "eternal" question: what do women want. But they want just a little: attention, understanding, self-care and, of course, wild unrestrained sex (yes, yes, but how without it). It is a pity that not every man can understand what women want and, at least partially, provide them with this.

Of course, there are such representatives of the stronger sex who manage to satisfy all women's desires. We have not been waiting for the beautiful for a long time; we just need a brave and passionate man. Now let's try to figure out being in bed. Ready?

Every woman has her secret sexual desires, which rarely come true. Why? Perhaps the main reason is that she is afraid of stunning (if not shocking) a man with her confession. She may also be simply afraid of offending him, and therefore remain silent. Below are some tips on how to give a woman a truly heavenly pleasure in bed.

Women love stubborn men. Contrary to the hackneyed opinion that if a girl refuses, it’s not worth insisting, it’s safe to say that very often our “no” is hiding a well-disguised “yes”. Basically, a woman, in this way, is trying to push you to more decisive action, and instead of continuing to pursue the girl, you abruptly give back. Try to tell her what a heady scent comes from her, how beautiful she looks. In a word, tell her what she wants to hear. After all, every woman carefully puts on make-up before a romantic evening, buys new sexy lingerie. Be able to show her how you are turned on by her every movement or her breath. And she will not forget this and will fully thank you for the wonderful words addressed to her.

We enjoy slowly: almost all women can achieve a full orgasm only if a man has worked hard before starting sex. After you find yourself, finally, in the same bed, remember the main rule: women love gentle, soft sex without mad attacks. Female potency, unlike male potency, takes time to warm up. Therefore, immediately before the sexual intercourse itself, try to caress each other (five to ten minutes) or apply the "69" position.

How should a kiss be? What kind of kiss does a woman prefer? This moment in sexual games is very important for every girl, sometimes even more important than sex itself. It all starts with a kiss, so don't neglect it. Next, slowly move on to the neck. Kiss with a rush (but do not forget about ugly bruises, popularly referred to as "hickeys", control your strength).

Don't forget to caress her body. Bite and kiss them. Some women are so excited that they will do everything themselves. And, of course, do not forget about the chest (no matter what size it is).

The most important thing in sex is to be interested in the opinion of your partner, and then you will really understand what she really is.

This, of course, was one side of the issue, about what women want. But do not forget that in addition to women, they also experience the Platonic. Many men are interested in another question: why do women want to get married? Perhaps they are inherent in nature and usually arise unconsciously. Some want to get married to keep up with their long-married girlfriends, some because they are madly in love. And there is another category of women who marry for sex. Well, they can't sleep with anyone, they want a husband. But it doesn’t matter what motives a woman wants to get married, it’s important to just love and want her (even despite this

I would like to believe that, after reading this article, men will understand at least a little in female logic and will be able to deliver real pleasure to their loved ones.