Every woman first asks herself this question with great caution. Yes, this thought flashes through my head very rarely and immediately goes away. Why? How why? It’s just that the time hasn’t come yet, few attempts have been made yet, but next month everything will definitely work out. However, the next month comes, and there were still no children. Now this question comes to mind again and again. So, why are there no children? First we lie and think with ourselves. But time passes, so you have to turn to specialists, read feature articles, try to figure out what is the reason for the lack of pregnancy.

Let's go to a specialist. Don't be afraid to contact a good gynecologist to solve your problem. A professional will answer your question much better than you yourself. The gynecologist will not just look at the condition of your body, but will also do an analysis and give an accurate description of your current state of health. His advice will be the most important for you, since he gives it to you based on the analyzes he has done. It focuses solely on your personal problem, and not on all problems combined. Now we can only tell you the general reasons for the absence of pregnancy. If the doctor gave you disappointing results, this is not a reason to be upset. Just think logically. So, are all our specialists truly highly qualified? We are all humans. Some were helped to get into a prestigious clinic by relatives, others by friends. If a person works in an expensive hospital, this does not mean that he is a good specialist. There are people who graduated from the university with a diploma and thought for a long time about how to find a job and, in the end, they got a job in government clinics, where they pay pennies and admit people for free. However, this does not make the doctor’s qualifications any lower; he can still give the right advice. Therefore, we recommend that if you receive a disappointing diagnosis, go for examination at another clinic to another specialist. Most likely, you will receive a different examination result there. If you live in a small town, today you can get advice via the Internet. Get examined, and then talk via Skype with a good specialist from a big city. Perhaps he can help you.

Sanatoriums. Take a course of treatment at a sanatorium. Perhaps your body is simply not ready to become pregnant. For example, you just need a general course of treatment, general tone, filling the body with vitamins, fresh air, and removing toxins from the body. Many girls, completely relaxed, can easily become pregnant.

Don't think about pregnancy. As a rule, what you think about most, what you desire most, does not work out. When you make love to your spouse, give yourself completely to him, don't think about anything, don't worry about what might not work out this time, then you will get pregnant. Many psychologists advise those couples who have not had children for a long time to adopt a child. Psychics also use the same technique. Supposedly, if you do a good deed, take a child into the family, then everything will work out for you. What's really going on? Yes, you take another child into the family, now you have experienced the joy of motherhood, now you spend your days thinking about what to buy for the baby, how to make sure he doesn’t catch a cold, how to cure him of illnesses. You do all these things with special joy. Now you don't think about your child 24 hours a day. You just enjoy life, then you can easily get pregnant. Why do teenagers and young people get pregnant easily and simply? They simply do not think about the child; they are sure that if they are careless, the child will definitely be born. This is how it happens.

Compatibility analysis. Perhaps the fact that you don't have children is not your fault, but your spouse's. Take him to the doctor. Check whether your husband is capable of having children and how active his sperm are. It happens that his sperm are not so active that you can get pregnant. Then he needs to undergo treatment.

Age. Very often doctors blame age. Allegedly, it is very difficult for a woman over 40 to become pregnant. This is such nonsense that you shouldn't even listen to it. Look on the Internet for real stories of those women who gave birth to a child at both 43 and 45 years old. They just knew that everything would work out for them, that under the close attention of doctors, they would be able to give birth to not just one, but twins or triplets. As a last resort, there is artificial insemination, when the probability of pregnancy is 80%. The main thing is to believe and know that pregnancy will certainly happen.

Birth control pills. If you take birth control pills, your chance of getting pregnant increases significantly in the first 1-2 months after stopping the course. Therefore, be prepared for the fact that you will soon have a small child. If you can't get pregnant, then try a little trick. Take birth control pills for six months, and then for the first month after taking them, don’t even think about pregnancy. Then you yourself will be amazed at the result. At the same time, children are born absolutely healthy, strong, smart and beautiful.

Go to the bathhouse less. Don't take hot showers. It may happen that you are already pregnant, but you went to the sauna and now you are not pregnant. In the first days, weeks, months, the possibility of miscarriage is very high. It can also be triggered by sudden changes in temperature. Therefore, give up the sauna, hot shower and hot bath. You will be surprised, but this can help pregnancy.

Sport. Sports are always good for maintaining the overall tone of the body. However, if you overuse sports activities, pregnancy may not occur. It’s enough just to go to the gym 2 times a week and work out there for 1 hour. Then you will look great, and pregnancy will come faster.

Your weight. Look at yourself in the mirror. How much do you weigh? If you see a thin person in the reflection, then you shouldn’t be surprised why you don’t have children. How will the baby develop, how are you going to give birth to him if you don’t have a belly? Previously, women gave birth very often because their bodies were ready for childbirth. Now a new life simply cannot arise in the body of a skeleton. Yes, we don’t argue, thin girls give birth to children, but their thinness is hereditary. These girls eat whatever they want. They eat bread, pasta, ice cream, and nuts in the quantities required. It’s just the way their body is designed that it doesn’t gain weight. If you constantly go on diets and overload your body in the gym, then nothing good will come of it.

Your body is simply not ready. Maybe your body is simply not ready for childbirth yet. How do you know if you can give birth? It's very simple, if you notice that with the same amount of food you begin to gain weight, or your body constantly asks for new and new food, then it is preparing to get pregnant. Nature is much wiser than us. A person only needs to listen to it in order to begin raising a happy, healthy baby with loving parents after some time.

One woman came to the Teacher asking why she had no children. She said that she and her husband had been trying to conceive a child for many years without success. The couple really tried everything - from the most modern methods of infertility treatment to visiting holy places and traditional healers. But it was no use.

– What are you willing to do to have a child? – asked the Teacher.

“Everything,” the woman answered confidently.

-Are you ready to die?

“Yes,” the woman answered.

But she didn't die. Or rather, the woman who could not have children died. And the one who began to learn mindfulness, two years later, gave birth to a long-awaited daughter.

You say this story is too fictional? Or the parable about spiritual teachers that fill the Internet? But the fact of the matter is that this miracle-like story is absolutely true, and all its participants are real people. Although in this case it is a miracle, rather carefully prepared than performed by magic. “Dying” did not mean physical death, but the renunciation of the worldview, beliefs and thoughts that did not allow this woman to become pregnant. Having an unbending intention, she was able to change and a child appeared in her family.

In this particular case we are talking about a miracle because this couple had karmic causes of infertility. In order for a miracle to happen, they needed to touch the high Spirit, their higher “I”. The woman learned to realize her feminine nature, stopped putting pressure on others, and took responsibility for what was happening in her life. And this is awareness of oneself as a Soul, increasing its vibrations at the energy level. The opportunity to have a child came as a result of the work done.

So, there are three global reasons why conception and birth of a child are impossible. It should be taken into account that in all three options there is a very strict pressure from public opinion that “children are necessary for happiness.”

The first, karmic reason infertility we just covered. This is the most difficult option. But, as you can see, he is not hopeless.

The second reason– the soul, upon incarnation, decided that it did not need such an experience in this life. In this case, a person becomes happy, freed from the desire to meet standards. He is aware of himself and his true needs. He understands that he doesn't really want it and doesn't need it. His happiness and the fulfillment of his destiny lies in a completely different area.

Third reason the absence of children is, no matter how contradictory it may sound, in the absence of desire to have children. In this case, it also requires awareness of what you really want. In order to be happy, such couples need to understand that they do not want this and, by and large, they do not need it. Perhaps the desire to have children is secondary, and the main thing is still personal freedom, relationships and career.

However, there comes a time when society begins to press the question: “Why don’t you have children?” Sometimes this issue arises very harshly in the family and then the relationship between spouses becomes unbearable. Let's say the couple achieved everything they dreamed of. There is a house, an apartment, material security. But depression begins. “I don’t know what else I would want.” Trust relationships between partners are lost... And everything collapses. “There are no children, that’s why everything is so bad,” many people think in such cases. But people's true intentions are revealed by their actions, not their words.

Therefore, when healing, a person is invited to act in ways that are unexpected for him. And how they are fulfilled characterizes true desires. For example, spouses come with a question about infertility, during the training process their relationship is improved (healed) and the couple, under some pretext, ends the classes. This suggests that they didn't really want children. But this is not a reason to be unhappy.

It is also possible that thanks to the awareness of one’s reluctance, one immediately comes to understand that before we didn’t want children, but now we do! And then the contract that they unconsciously made with life or with themselves simply needs to be reformatted. To do this, it is enough to say to yourself: “Now I want to have children and I am changing my previous point of view.” Usually, one such awareness is enough for a child to appear. It means: accepting experience, changing intentions and, as a result, changing consciousness.

Once upon a time, the absence of offspring was considered a curse, the most terrible punishment of the gods. Those who have read the Bible know that in ancient Palestine, for example, a couple without offspring could be subjected to natural obstruction, even to the point of expulsion: apparently, the family of the Lord had somehow angered the Lord, since He deprived them of the happiness of childbearing.

Relatively (by historical standards) recently, only one hundred and fifty to two hundred years ago, the concept of “ family planning“did not exist in principle, they gave birth as many as God sent.

And why go so far into the past, if only ten years ago we ourselves could not explain to our relatives why our family, five years after marriage, still had no offspring.

Aren't you sick? Has God deprived the spouse of male strength? The explanations that we just don’t want it yet were not understood and categorically accepted by our relatives, and yet the difference between them and us is only one or two generations.

Nowadays, families with one or two children are the majority in our area, “ small families", as they were defined in the government papers of the Russian Empire, became the norm. At the same time, the number of families without offspring at all has increased. What are the reasons for this phenomenon, and how to live without children?

What are the reasons?

Journalists, greedy for dubious sensations, present the decline in the birth rate and the decline in population as some kind of unprecedented specificity of ours. In fact, a decline in the birth rate and the average number of children in a society is observed throughout Europe.

Until recently, a similar picture was observed in the United States, but now the statistics have been reversed by actively breeding migrants from Mexico and Latin America.

By and large, everything is more or less clear about the reason for “few children”; with the development of civilization, a large number of offspring has ceased to be economically feasible. In a primitive peasant economy, the number of workers was the decisive factor ensuring not even prosperity, but physical survival.

Already at the age of five or six, the son was a household assistant, and at 14-15 he was a full-time worker. After the baby was weaned, care for him fell entirely on the shoulders of the elders, thus, “ reproducing conveyor» switched to full self-sufficiency.

Having numerous offspring was simply profitable, but the benefits disappeared - the massive number of families became a thing of the past.

The attentive reader will ask, what about the fertile immigrants? Are they really engaged in primitive agriculture? The reason for the fertility of marginalized people is social benefits accrued, including to offspring.

More “livestock” means more social “buns”, again the economic factor is obvious. However, the analysis of social policy lies far beyond the scope of our discussion today, so there is no point in dwelling on this point in detail.

Arguments in favor of childlessness

We’ve sorted out the issue of “few children,” but parenthood is a natural need, so what is the reason for the complete absence of offspring in some families?

“Child-centrism”... against children

We are so used to the fact that " all the best for children», « children is our future“And similar postulates and slogans that seem to us to be something self-evident, it seems that things have always been this way. However, this is not the case. The already mentioned economically justified peasant large number of offspring also had a downside.

The first and best piece of the meager peasant food always went to the peasant - the head of the family, the main worker and breadwinner, then to the helper wife, and only after that to the children, always first the eldest, then the youngest.

This, frankly speaking, wild situation from a modern point of view had a harsh practicality in life: with the death of the man-breadwinner, the family was doomed, it was much easier for the family to survive the death of the wife, and the kids... God gave - God took, it was a long time to grieve and kill there was no time, work was not waiting.

Thanks to progress, the specter of hunger has ceased to haunt the backs of almost every family, which has had a very beneficial effect on attitudes towards offspring, but the pendulum has swung to the other extreme. The baby is proclaimed the center of the family universe, Moloch, on whose altar all other interests of the family should lie.

Instead of a healthy attitude towards children, as natural fruits of love, beloved but younger members of the family, sometimes real “child worship” occurs. To replace the child helper, a child god is often erected on a pedestal.

The greatest gift that parents give their child - life itself - is no longer enough; society dictates that the family must prove that it is worthy of bringing a child into this world. Before giving birth, it is necessary to provide for the child... and then follows a list, the completeness of which is limited only by imagination.

Sometimes it comes to the point that a family refuses a second child because... the first one is against it! After all, this can reduce the amount of benefits and parental attention he receives. Involving an older child in helping to support a younger one is often declared by society to be unacceptable violence against the freedom of the older child.

The fear of being an “unworthy” parent, the prospect of renouncing everything for the good of the child, as well as the underlying fear of becoming a slave to one’s own child turns many away from parenthood in general.

Life without children

Regardless of the reasons, if the desired joy of motherhood is not available to you, then how to live without children? It should be remembered that the instinct of motherhood, even if it is the strongest (often the instinct of motherhood is stronger than even the instinct of self-preservation), is just an instinct.

Children are born in a certain year, month, day and hour, and this is not determined by us. It seems to us that we are deciding something, that we can plan the birth of a child - we are preparing, calculating, getting our health in order... In fact, we are simply carrying out a certain program laid down earlier: the year, month, day and hour of the birth of the child, which determines its energy characteristics by 90% (based on my practice), depends on our ancestors on both the paternal and maternal lines, up to the seventh generation. The actions of our ancestors, which carry a certain emotional coloring that influences the energy of other people, subsequently program the presence, development and quality of the future lives of their descendants. This is a “rough” setting that we cannot change.

All we can really do is, if we draw an analogy with a radio receiver, turn the “fine” tuning knob in one direction or another, but always within the range given to us. Since our thoughts, actions, words and emotions have an additional impact, both positive and negative, on the energy characteristics of our child, then before the moment of conception we can either correct something, or, without knowing it, make it worse. This is entirely our responsibility. And here you will have to ask only yourself.

Fate (providence, energy laws of interaction) is wise, and it is simply waiting to give us children who are as balanced as possible, energetically matching both parents. It takes up to eight years for the individual energy generators of the parents to hit the desired resonance, which, in turn, would lead to offspring with the most favorable combination of energies. This case, by the way, can be corrected quite well, since all that needs to be done is to bring the energies into resonance. The work, of course, is painstaking and individual: sometimes it is necessary to move geographically, change place of residence, sometimes it is necessary to “weaken” or “strengthen” one of the partners, sometimes it is enough to change the lifestyle and/or profession, sometimes it is necessary to remove people with incompatible energy from the environment.

If someone has to wait more than 8 years, then most likely the reason is the unfavorable combinations of energy described below.

It is possible that people are so unsuited to each other energetically that they can only give birth to physically or mentally ill children. And here fate uses all means to avoid this. For example, very passionate emotional relationships, what is called love to the point of insanity, as a rule, produce unhealthy offspring. It would seem illogical - a fountain of feelings and emotions, love that happens “once in a lifetime.” But at the energy level, such relationships can be compared to a short circuit, which, as we know, does not lead to anything good. This was known long before us: in the old days, healers considered such love to be a disease, and diseases, as a rule, are contagious. So, such a painful relationship can only produce a sick child. But, for example, the Chinese, to simplify the situation, created their own classification of unfavorable combinations - just refer to the Chinese horoscope.

Another rather important point is that people are not suitable for each other, but according to different characteristics. And then it may turn out that the children will be healthy, but one of the spouses will face an early death if this marriage continues. Fate, by not giving them children, thus pushes them towards separation so that they can create a safer marriage with another person. There are a million examples of this, and you yourself will remember cases among your friends when, in subsequent marriages, both easily and quickly have healthy children.

It is clear that these, subject to the exclusion of problems at the physical level, are only two main reasons, the most common, and there are other special cases.

What happens when there are problems at the physical level? I believe that my audience already has sufficient knowledge to understand that the root cause of all disturbances in the functioning of body systems lies in the plane of energy. Energy imbalance is the root cause of everything that happens on the physical level. Any diagnosis is already an imbalance. If a diagnosis cannot be made or it is constantly changing, then there is reason to seriously think about the energy component. Infertility is one of the consequences of energy imbalance. And, fortunately, it is not always fatal. In my practice, there were various situations related to this problem, which were successfully resolved. The most difficult thing is when infertility is caused by the merits of the ancestors, when the family stops at a certain point. Unfortunately, there is hardly anything that can be done here.

For example, one of the spouses inherited an energy problem from their ancestors - this is often called a “family curse.” What is a generational curse? This is a type of qualified energy influence, which, as a rule, is expressed in the complete or partial loss (closing) of intuition, the impossibility of long-term partnerships, and the inability to have children. If such a person took a person with crystal clear energy as his wife, then it turns out that fate has no reason to punish his soul mate by giving her a sick child. And it’s unlikely that another spouse can be born from this spouse, alas...

As for termination of pregnancy, there are more social and ethical issues, as well as issues of a religious nature - and this is clearly not in my competence. If we consider it from the point of view of energy laws, then many things go against Christian commandments, and it is your right to accept it or not. I’m just expressing my opinion: a mother should have the right not to give birth to a child if she, even in a happy marriage and generally not against children, has a strong presentiment that “something is wrong” with this particular child. Even knowing 100%, I will never take upon myself the responsibility of telling a pregnant woman that her child will be far from ideal, I can only hint that she should trust her feelings. I only regret that such a woman did not come to me earlier, when it would have been possible to find a favorable time for the birth of a child - healthy, most suitable for both parents.

You definitely shouldn’t terminate your pregnancy if you want a child, but the only argument not to have one is financial problems. Remember one universal energy law, which is expressed in simple words that are close to people: “God gives a child, God will give for a child.”

A child does not come into this world as a dependent; he will bring with him exactly as much energy as he needs for his entire life. And in the first years of his life (and this is the answer to the question of where his own energy is located until he is 10-12 years old), he will completely give his energy to you for temporary use. You will be able to support it, at least you will definitely have “bread and butter”. Well, for the sake of continuing the kind of “without caviar”, you can survive, right?

___________________________________________

Alexander Litvin- winner of the sixth season of the “Battle of Psychics” program on the TNT channel, a person with the ability to see the energy of places, people and circumstances. A physician by training, he headed the medical service of a military unit in Chukotka for 15 years. He retired at 33, returned to his hometown of Troitsk, and worked at customs. In August 2008, he resigned from customs, sensing a real chance of winning in the “Battle of Psychics” project. Currently lives in Moscow, is engaged in private practice and business consulting.

“A happy person is one who has found harmony with himself. When we understand what it takes to be happy, everything becomes easier. We are moving towards the goal by modeling the future,” says Alexander.

LiveJournal address: A-LITVIN.LIVEJOURNAL.COM

How do you imagine a traditional strong and happy family? Most likely, for you, as for most people, it consists of mom, dad and one or more children. Many even believe that a marriage without children cannot be called a family at all. “This is selfishness,” some say. “Having children strengthens a marriage; they are the only reason it’s worth starting a family,” others add.

But there are many couples who live together for many years without children. Another thing is how happy they are.

The hardest thing is when marriage without children is not a conscious choice, but a forced situation. Nastya got married while still very young - at 19 years old. “I fell in love and dreamed of a big, strong family,” she says. “Many acquaintances gossiped then that I was pregnant, and that’s why I was in such a hurry. And they better be right.” Nastya has been married for 6 years, she loves her husband, but they still don’t have children.

Incompatibility of Rh factors, inflammatory diseases, hormonal disorders, poor heredity... There are dozens of reasons for infertility. Sometimes doctors cannot even name a specific problem. Couples all over the world are faced with the fact that they cannot have children, which is why reproductive medicine is so popular now. Many women believe that marriage presupposes the birth of children, otherwise, why have a wedding at all? “A family without children is not a family at all for me,” Nastya continues, “just two lovers.”

Some couples, having lived without children for several years, divorce and make another attempt. Maria, 35, says she spent seven years visiting doctors trying to get pregnant: “We spent a huge amount on hospitals and medications. And the most important thing is that all the doctors made different diagnoses.” It was not possible to save the marriage; it fell apart: the lack of children was the main stumbling block: “I was 29 when Andrei and I divorced. And, to be honest, I was desperate. But now I don’t regret it,” says Maria. A three-year-old baby sits on her lap - the youngest son from her second marriage. The girl was lucky: literally six months after breaking up with her first husband, she met her second. There were no problems with pregnancy with him.

Her ex-husband also created a new family: with his second wife he had a daughter. But deciding to divorce can be difficult, especially if you sincerely love your husband and cannot imagine anyone else in his place. There is no point in getting a divorce because of infertility; modern medicine offers many different options for solving this problem. It is worth breaking up only if the problem of lack of children has so ruined your relationship with your husband that you have become distant from each other.

It’s a completely different matter when you don’t want children in principle. And it doesn't matter whether you're married or not. Unmarried women who declare that they do not want to have children are usually advised to hold off, explaining that “the one” has not yet met. This often happens, but not always. There may be several reasons. Some think only about their career, others believe that they cannot take on such a huge responsibility as giving birth and, most importantly, raising children, while others adhere to a selfish ideology and are not ready to sacrifice their own comfort. Olga is 42 years old, she is a primary school teacher, but she does not have any children of her own. “I love children, otherwise I would not have chosen this profession. But I never wanted to give birth myself. And how to raise a child? My salary is barely enough for me alone, my ex-husband also works at school, we would not be able to provide our children with a comfortable life.” Olga's husband could neither convince her nor come to terms with his wife's decision, so they divorced.

But it also happens that the reluctance to have children unites spouses, and they live happily together. Pasha and Sveta have been married for seven years; at first they avoided the “children’s question” and simply enjoyed life together. “I was afraid that because of my reluctance to have children, Sveta would leave me, but I love her.” For the first time, when Pasha started talking about children, his wife suggested holding off, the second time she admitted that she did not want to give birth. When asked why, Sveta does not give a definite answer: “I just don’t want to. How can I imagine this... Someone lives inside. And then there’s this pain during childbirth. And all the subsequent torment and education. This is not for me".