Many caring parents worry: “How to properly raise a child so that he grows up to be an intelligent, cultured, neat, caring, polite and erudite person?”

I perfectly understand the anxiety of daddies and mommies, so I want to devote this article to the nuances of raising a two-year-old toddler, give practice-tested recommendations, and also “sort out” the child’s psychology.

Features of development of a 2-year-old child.

By the age of two, the toddler’s physical capabilities noticeably develop:

• The waking time increases, because the baby already sleeps once a day
• vocabulary is about 300 words
• actively plays with objects, pushes them, moves them, walks around them, and is interested in what is inside.
• knows the functional properties of many things around him. For example, a car is driving, a bird is flying, a boat is sailing, etc.
• imitates the actions and movements of adults
• shows emotions: surprise, admiration, affection, pity, sympathy, joy, pride, disappointment, etc.

If you want to raise a child, start with YOURSELF!

I’ll say right away that ensuring a decent upbringing of a child is a huge painstaking process that must be carried out, adhering to certain rules:

It is important to control and monitor your behavior. If you watch TV and tell your child that you can’t watch TV, then don’t expect obedience. The toddler is at such an age that he wants to perform the actions that you perform, and if you ask him to do something, then most likely he will resist. For example, you ask him to calm down and stand still, but, as luck would have it, he will circle around without stopping. In this case, I recommend telling him: “Run faster!” I give 90% that he will be very surprised, stop and decide to take a break!

Remember that when raising a child, you need to show restraint and patience in order to adequately respond to the manifestation of his leadership, creative and hyperactive qualities. After all, children are small individuals with different temperaments, abilities, inclinations, etc. For example, if a toddler is a leader by nature and constantly expresses his opinion, puts forward ideas and suggestions, then do not judge him, be sure to listen and give him freedom of choice in some things. Thus, the baby will grow up to be a confident person, a leader whose opinion others will listen to.

By the way, if your child draws everywhere: on walls, wallpaper, furniture, and also willingly does modeling, loves to play with construction sets, enjoys making appliques, etc., then your child is a person with enormous creative potential.

In this case, I recommend that parents provide the appropriate space, necessary materials and items for the development of his talent. After my daughter painted the sofa, I realized that I urgently needed to buy a drawing board, whatman paper, pencils, craft kits, etc.

Don’t be upset if your child behaves like a monkey: jumping on the sofa or bed, climbing any heights, constantly turning and spinning, not sitting in one place. Just your little one from among the hyperactive children.

Don't scold your child for this, but just find something for him to do using his physical abilities. This could be a visit to the children's playground, outdoor games and much more.

There are categories of guys who are called tireless helpers. Such children are obedient, always walk near their mother and try to help her in feeding pets, cleaning, arranging dishes, etc.

Don’t discourage him, interest the little one, ask him to perform one or another task that is feasible for him. Thus, from childhood he will be accustomed to hard work and will grow up to be your excellent assistant.
- teach your child the rules of etiquette, hygiene and self-care.

• showing love in physical form: hug, kiss the baby, play with him, feed him and talk. Do not hit him or offend him under any circumstances! Otherwise, the little one will grow up unsure of himself, aggressive, distrustful or angry at the whole world. A boy should be brought up within strict limits, without unnecessary cooing, but also without despotic manners.
• do not limit the child’s physical capabilities and activity. As a rule, boys are more active than girls, so don’t be surprised if your tomboy walks around with knocked-out knees, bumps and bruises. It is very good if the boy develops well physically, since he is the future defender of not only the family, but also possibly the country.
• Don't worry if your boy doesn't speak well or doesn't always ask to go potty by age two. Practice shows that boys develop more slowly in this regard than girls.
• psychologists recommend that parents address their son with the words: “son”, “boy”, “helper”... Diminutive words such as “bunny”, “honey”, “cat” should be used as rarely as possible so that the little one from a very young age understood that he was a future man - the breadwinner and protector of his family.

Are you raising a girl?

• Develop your baby's creative abilities. Almost all girls are calm, balanced, and more diligent compared to boys. Monotonous work is easy for them, they have a developed sense of beauty and imagination, so girls enjoy drawing, sculpting, appliqué, etc.
• Encourage your daughter’s desire to express her emotions and feelings. Give your little princess compliments, shower her with praise and tenderness, then at a young or adult age she will not melt in front of boys at the very first compliment addressed to her. The baby must grow up to be self-sufficient, self-confident, and recognize deceitful and insincere feelings.
• Give your daughter the opportunity to choose one or another game on her own. Don’t be surprised if your little one, instead of playing mother-daughter, starts playing football, she just belongs to the category of “tomboy” girls. Over time, her priorities may change, and she will become a real lady!
• From childhood, explain to your baby that she can achieve a lot in this life. Show your daughter pictures of women - actresses, politicians, doctors, teachers... and explain that when she grows up, she will become a respected aunt.

And finally, I want to evaluate the incomprehensible behavior of a two-year-old child in certain situations and give recommendations:

• a child is capricious, hysterical and mischievous for no reason - he is calling you into conflict! You can scold him, but under no circumstances intimidate him or use physical violence. He must know that punishment is not torture, but a consequence of his disgusting behavior.
• the kid is trying to express his point of view, interrupts you, wants to do it his own way. Be sure to listen to him, and then calmly explain what he is wrong about or think: maybe the words of a baby speak the truth!

Good luck to you, dear parents, in raising your little happiness!

Read more:

Games for children two years old

50 things we did as children and stayed alive and well!!!

Play exercises for children 2-3 years old

How to properly raise a child is difficult to answer unequivocally, because there is no ideal strategy for raising the future generation. All babies have their own personality from birth. Young princesses and little gentlemen are all different. Some babies are thoughtful and calm, others are funny and curious, others are naughty fidgets, and others are closed and silent. Therefore, the tactics of the educational process cannot be the same. Only the mother knows the character of the baby. Therefore, it is she who must choose the methods that are ideal for her baby. Psychologists can only outline a general strategy and recommend how not to act in order to protect the fragile young psyche from traumatic factors.

How to raise children correctly - psychology

In order for the baby to grow and develop correctly, parents need to organize suitable conditions for this. First of all, for comprehensive harmonious development, a child needs parental love and caring attitude. When a child feels indifference on the part of a significant adult, fertile ground is created for the emergence of a huge number of problems. We are not talking exclusively about behavioral deviations. The occurrence of health problems is also a reality.

Sometimes it happens that significant adults love a child, but the baby does not feel it. Therefore, it is necessary to demonstrate love to the little ones in any available way, hug them, talk about your own feelings, kiss them. The child should feel the unconditionality of parental love, understand that his parents will love him no matter what and will always help.

Most parents are interested in how to raise a child correctly, because the future existence of their child depends on this.

First of all, you should accept your little one completely, regardless of apparent shortcomings. Many parents make an almost irreparable mistake, trying to fit the baby into their own ideal of a human subject. And when they fail to do this, they feel disappointed. The child always feels parental disapproval, understands that they do not believe in him, that he could not meet parental expectations. As a result, the little ones suffer, which gives rise to many problems.

Your child, whether he is a three-year-old or a teenager, needs to be supported when he needs it. Children should understand that in any difficult situation, they can always rely on their parents. It is parents who instill a sense of security in their children.

It is not recommended to scare children with various popular horror stories. For example, when, for educational purposes, significant adults scare a baby that if he behaves badly, a woman will come and take him away, the child understands what is said literally. He thinks that some terrible person will enter the house, and his parents will allow the old woman to take him away. This results in a feeling of insecurity, and the authority of the parents falls. The baby no longer feels safe.

You should be more interested in the child’s life, talk about various topics with him, especially those that interest the baby himself, spend more leisure time together, doing enjoyable activities for both. Spending time together, filled with bright positive emotions, contributes to the emergence of friendly interaction between adults and children.

You need to respect your own child; you should not brush aside the words of the baby, his opinion. Phrases like: “don’t be smart”, “it’s too young to give out advice” are unacceptable. It is necessary to praise the offspring even for the slightest successes.

In order to teach a child anything, it is necessary to take into account one childhood characteristic - kids brilliantly remember everything that interests them. Therefore, there is no reason to hammer knowledge into a child; it is better to make classes interesting for him, and also that they include playful moments.

Notations should not be overused. After all, they are boring and completely uninteresting to the baby. It is better to demonstrate the desired behavior through your own actions. Children always take the actions of their parents as a model.

How to properly raise a child from birth

It is better to start the educational process from the first decades of the baby’s life. The active development of babies occurs just in the first year of their life. At the stage described, they adapt to the environment and gain their first valuable experience. After all, in just 12 months, the baby needs to learn to coo, smile, respond to parental voices, mood, and distinguish intonations.

Often, parents of infants pay more attention to following the daily routine and diet, proper care, rather than the educational process. It is before the age of one that the basic habits of the offspring are laid down on the subconscious level, inclinations and personality traits are formed. The further maturation of the baby is mainly determined by the educational process in infancy.

Conventionally, the annual stage of educational work is usually divided into 4 stages in accordance with trimesters.

This stage involves the formation of “correct” habits in children and the prevention of the formation of harmful ones. In addition, here parents should properly organize the baby’s nutrition. This is very important for adequate weight gain and the development of addiction to the regime.

In this trimester, the baby should develop habits such as:

– without a pacifier, immerse yourself in the Morphean kingdom on the street;

– spend some time in the crib, having fun on your own;

– hold the head;

– show displeasure when changing a diaper;

- fall asleep without motion sickness.

It is also recommended to pay serious attention to the hygiene of the baby. Toddlers' mornings should begin with mother's friendly smile, hygienic procedures, which include washing the baby's hands and face, washing, and changing a diaper. These daily activities will help the offspring develop the habit of keeping themselves clean.

To develop the habit of holding the baby's head, you need to lay him on his tummy. Gradually, the baby will get used to the described action, and the muscles of the neck and back will become stronger.

In order for the child to start gurgling, you should play with him more often. It’s also good if the baby hears nursery rhymes and children’s songs. Any action directly related to the child needs to be commented on, told, for example, how to put on rompers or change a diaper. When talking with a baby, it is recommended to smile, since this is how the culture of communicative interaction is established.

In the next trimester, visual, sensory and auditory perception of the world develops. The stage under consideration includes preparing the offspring for speech. Here it is recommended to include musical melodies of various genres. At the same time, it is better that they are harmonious and light: classics, children's tunes, modern motifs. In order for a child to walk and begin to babble, his attention must be directed to other sounds. He should be introduced to the surrounding reality, attracting his interest to the chirping of birds, the sound of flowing water, and the rattling of a tractor.

The mental formation of the baby at the stage described should begin with communicative interaction. Parents need to play with their child, shaping his perception. It is recommended to start practicing while awake, when the offspring is not bothered by anything and is cheerful. Such activities should bring pleasure to the baby, so you should not play with the baby when he wants to eat or is capricious. At this stage, the moral and aesthetic foundations of education are laid, which the child receives as a result of communication with relatives.

Love and joyful emotions given to the baby will become the starting point for forging a moral and aesthetic behavioral model. In addition to the above, the routine should also include daily exercise and massage. At this stage, the exercises should be more varied, since their goal is to prepare the baby for crawling.

The stage of the third trimester is marked by the restlessness of the offspring and his curiosity. The activity of children at the described stage increases significantly. Since the child has already learned to crawl and sit down, and some babies are trying to stand up, it is time for physical training.

First of all, the baby must be given freedom of movement around the home. Therefore, the possible route of his travel should be secured as much as possible. In this trimester, babies are increasingly interested in the contents of drawers and cabinets, so it is recommended to remove any items that could harm the baby.

At this stage, you can already make your first attempts to potty train your child. It is necessary to sit the baby on the potty after feeding, walking, sleeping. After some time, the baby will understand the purpose for which he is placed on the potty. At approximately seven months of age, you can begin to teach your baby how to wash his hands. Thus, the concept of cleanliness is formed.

By putting on tiny bibs before feeding and changing soiled clothes immediately after they get dirty, mothers instill neatness in their children. At the same time, adults need to comment on each action and explain it.

Play activities are important for children, regardless of age. Through it they learn about the world. At seven to eight months of age, you can show your baby simple toys and how to manipulate them, for example, showing how a ball rolls or the wheels of a car spin. Also, at the stage described, you can already show individual parts of the head: nose, eyes, ears. It is necessary to work with babies in the third trimester every day. Here you should also familiarize your offspring with the prohibition words: “impossible.” For example, when a baby fights during play activities, it is necessary to say “no”, explaining the reasons (it’s unpleasant for me, it hurts).

In the fourth trimester, raising a child covers absolutely all areas of its activity. Here the baby actively interacts with the adult environment and tries to walk independently. When a baby stands on knives on his own, he should be encouraged. First, you need to help the little one, lead him, holding him by two hands, then by one. After a while, the baby will be able to linger, standing on his feet, for a few seconds.

The mental formation of a baby is based on instilling in him the skill of manipulating objects. A full-fledged educational process includes close communicative interaction with the offspring. You should talk to your little one constantly, but it is not recommended to copy a child’s speech or lisp. This can give rise to the formation of a speech defect.

How to properly raise a 1 year old child

Human personality, according to psychological research, is formed at an early stage of existence. Therefore, it is very important during the educational process that a one-year-old baby acquires the experience necessary for future existence, which will become the foundation of his attitude towards the environment and surroundings.

At the stage under consideration, the game process is the prevailing type of activity. However, due to his age, the baby cannot independently organize his own leisure time. Therefore, it falls on the parents' shoulders. It is necessary to show the child possible manipulations with toys, for example, how a doll walks, a frog jumps, or a car transports. Role-playing games are also important; together with your little one, you can treat a sick bear or cook dinner for a bunny. However, the plots of the games should be primitive so that the child understands them well.

At the same time, during playful leisure time it is necessary to closely monitor the offspring. The game will reflect a child’s idea of ​​existing family relationships, the world, and people. Observation will allow parents to promptly correct negative ideas or destructive attitudes.

The one-year-old understands exclusively visual-figurative appeal. Therefore, in order to convey some information to the baby, you need to model the situation based on fairy tales and taking your favorite heroes as examples.

You also need to constantly explain to the little one how to behave, what is good, what actions are bad. In addition, parents should always remain a positive example, since kids always imitate the adults around them. At this stage of upbringing, parents should regularly clean, put things in their designated places, and demonstrate through their own actions that they comply with the daily routine and hygiene rules.

How to properly raise a 2 year old child

In the period under review, the educational process should differ in relation to boys and young ladies.

Raising a boy should include, first of all, the expression of love in various forms: hugs, kisses, conversations, joint games. It is forbidden to hit or offend the baby, as he may grow up insecure, aggressive, angry or distrustful. The boy must be raised within strict boundaries, without excessive lisp, but also without domineering manners.

You should not limit the boy’s physical capabilities and his activity. It is normal if the baby often walks with broken knees, because the future defender of the family and the Fatherland is growing.

When addressing a baby, it is better to use his name, or call him “son,” and it is better not to use diminutive forms such as “honey” and “bunny.” The child must realize from an early age that he is growing into a man and in the future will become the breadwinner and protector of the family.

The education of young ladies must be aimed at developing creative potential. Girls, in comparison with their “antipodes,” are more balanced, diligent, and calm. Monotonous manipulations are easier for them. They have a developed imagination and a sense of beauty.

It is necessary to encourage daughters’ desire to express their own feelings, to compliment the young princess, to shower her with praise and tenderness. Girls should grow up to be confident, self-sufficient, and be able to recognize false feelings.

Children should be given the opportunity to choose their own play. From childhood, little ladies need to be taught that they can achieve a lot in life. You can show them photographs of successful ladies - doctors, politicians, actresses, explaining to them along the way that when they grow up, they can become just as successful and respected aunts.

How to properly raise a child at 3 years old

A three-year-old child is a rather serious test of strength for parents. After all, the baby has already grown noticeably and started talking. The baby already has an active position in expressing his own aspirations. At a certain point, the baby’s behavioral response and his actions began to change dramatically. The previously obedient toddler turns into an obnoxious “bandit”. This is how the three-year crisis manifests itself.

The most important thing here is patience on the part of significant adults. Any situation of disobedience of the offspring that arises should be assessed extremely soberly. It is necessary to understand the feelings of children and skillfully use children's whims against them. For example, when a toddler refuses to put away toys, but rather scatters them, you should ask the child never to collect them.

In the period described, various requirements and prohibitions were ineffective. It is better to try to switch the child’s attention to activities that are more exciting for him.

It is not recommended to react too violently to hysterical attacks. However, there is no need to indulge all sorts of children’s whims either. A three-year-old tests the boundaries of what is permitted. How much can his parents afford? If you give the little one what he wants at the slightest, then he will develop the habit of starting to tantrum at the slightest provocation. You need to try to distract the offspring from the provoking factor, to something else interesting.

The educational process at 3 years old should be based on consistency. If the mother forbade the baby to do something, then the father should not allow him to do it. This rule should be especially clearly conveyed to compassionate grandmothers and kind grandfathers.

And most importantly, toddlers should be raised with love. It is necessary to take care of the offspring, train them, and show them the desired behavior by their own positive example.

How to raise a choleric child

A choleric child is tireless by nature. Nature has endowed such a baby with powerful energy potential. From an early age, the baby shows his intolerable temperament, and loved ones say in bewilderment: “What a character!” The task of the adult environment in a particular case is to help the baby grow moderately flexible, restrained and compromising.

The little owner of this temperament endlessly moves, which is characterized by impetuosity and abruptness, as if someone is chasing him. Such a baby cannot stand long waits, and therefore is not able to sit idle in one place for a long time. The child’s conversation is emotional, the words sound abruptly and quickly. He does not speak, but chatters, swallowing words and syllables. Sometimes he gets so carried away by monologues that he is unable to hear anyone.

Often loses control over himself, starting to shout and argue loudly. Raising a 3-4 year old choleric child is not easy. This kid loves adventure and risk. At the same time, the baby’s susceptibility to sudden changes in mood plunges those close to him into bewilderment.

A kid can easily change his mind at the last minute. You never know what to expect from him. He can behave unconventionally in any situation. The baby himself often does not understand what is happening to him due to his impulsiveness. A child with a choleric temperament makes decisions instantly, his ideas are spontaneous, but often interesting. The baby is quickly captivated by everything new, but he also easily forgets about it in a short time. During training, he shows abilities if the child is interested at the moment.

The little choleric person falls asleep with difficulty and takes a very long time. Restless sleep, depending on the impressions of the day.

A choleric person has a lot of positive qualities: fearlessness, risk-taking, courage, determination, self-confidence, perseverance. At the same time, there is a tendency to stubbornness, restlessness, cockiness, conflict, impatience, playfulness, which gives parents certain difficulties in raising a choleric child.

Considering that choleric children are emotionally unstable, their parents need to master the ability to control their own emotions. Before speaking to your child out of impulse or frustration, you need to stop, take a few deep breaths or count to ten and just think about whether notations and screams aimed at the baby will help in your situation.

An energetic choleric child must be involved in doing useful things, for example, household chores. The child must see the final goal and result of his work. Teach your child to recite the stages of work out loud, then to himself, and strictly adhere to his plan.

For choleric people it is very important to engage in active sports. This will allow you to give vent to your energy, and training will teach you to calculate your strength. Such a baby simply needs living space, so you should go for walks with him as often as possible.

Designing, needlework, drawing, and manual labor can help develop attention and perseverance. It is important for parents not to bother the baby if he is distracted, and to encourage patience and diligence every time. It is important to teach your child to think through his decisions in advance, assessing his reserves of strength, and only then take action. Politeness should be taught in any situations, since the spontaneity of a choleric person often hurts people’s pride.

It is especially necessary to pay attention to the ability to establish relationships in a children's team, since parents will not be able to be there all the time. The choleric person's problem is imposing leadership on other children. The second problem of a choleric child is the desire for variety, so regular friends do not stick around. In this case, it is necessary to encourage the child to analyze his behavior, sort out conflict situations with him, and discuss films and books. It is necessary to teach the child to control his emotions, taking into account the interests of other people.

Humor will help in the fight against the bad mood of a choleric child. Show your child a way to release accumulated emotions: you can hit a toy, throw or hit a pillow. This will be better than taking out your anger on parents and children in kindergarten. Breathing exercises can also help with self-control. When the child’s emotional stress increases, you can use distracting techniques, for example, interest him in something else and switch him to this activity. Sometimes just a hug and reassurance is enough. Adults need to observe the behavioral manifestations of their baby as much as possible and influence even before he gets angry or bursts into tears. It is strictly forbidden to tease a little choleric person.

At the age of 2 years, the child begins to show his character, and for parents this often becomes a difficult test. The child begins to recognize himself as a separate person, and since he does not yet have the skills of self-control and does not see the difference between bad and good behavior, he uses crying and hysterics to express his independence and attract attention. During this period, parents should be patient and model the correct behavior of the baby. The principles of proper upbringing of a 2-year-old child will help them with this.

Principles of raising a 2 year old child

What techniques can be used to raise a 2-year-old child? There are no universal tips here, so in many cases you will have to act empirically, adapting to the individual characteristics of the baby. But at the same time, it is still worth adhering to the basic principles of raising a child at 2 years old.

Keep calm. Even when your child is having a tantrum or another outburst of anger, you should show complete equanimity. By using punishment in such cases, you will not achieve the desired result. The baby will only feel even more offended, and this will provoke him into new, sometimes even more violent hysterics. Try to completely ignore any annoying behavior of your child, unless it leads to situations that are dangerous to his health. Behavior to which you do not react in any way will gradually stop - the child will understand that tears and screams will in no way help him gain the attention of adults. Some parents make a grave mistake here: knowing that they can raise a 2-year-old child and wean him off tantrums using this technique, they forget that it does not work unless praise is used at the same time. It is very important to encourage and praise your baby every time he behaves correctly, even if just 5 minutes ago you had to endure his next tantrum.

Avoid stressful situations. Try to provide your child with a constant daily routine. When the baby gets used to it, he will know what to expect during the day - after meals there will be games, then sleep, a walk in the evening, etc. This will make him calmer and more obedient. If some day is out of the usual routine, tell your child about it in advance. For example, warn him when someone comes to see you or if you and your baby are planning to visit some places where he has never been before. Little children get tired of new experiences very quickly, so try not to disrupt your child’s daily routine too often, and if you need to go somewhere with him, it’s better to do it for a short time. It is recommended to increase the time that the baby can be away from home gradually.

Learn distraction maneuvers. When a child does not react to your comments and refuses to obey, try to distract him with something. Some spontaneously invented game is best suited for this. For example, if a baby categorically refuses to get dressed and go outside, instead of strict persuasion, which can only push him into another hysteria, start dressing him up with a rhyme or counting rhyme, or invite him to dress “for speed.” Some parents, who are concerned about the question of how to raise a child at 2 years old, do not consider it necessary to use this technique and use a variety of excuses - there is no time, this is all unnecessary, why spoil him, let him learn discipline. But you should not neglect such methods. The child reacts very well to any game processes, and you can come up with interesting distracting tricks both on the go and in advance. This way you will develop creative thinking in your baby, and most importantly, you will learn to easily negotiate with him without tears and hysterics.

Give your child the right to choose. An important principle of raising a child at 2 years old is the development of his independence. There are situations in which there can be no compromise, for example, if the baby does not want to sit in a car child seat, and you need to go, you will put him there anyway. But in some other cases, let him choose what he wants to do, thereby teaching him to make decisions himself. At the same time, it is important to go to the end and accept his choice, even if you know that in fact the baby wants something else. For example, if you offered him to play, and he refused only out of a feeling of contradiction, do not persuade him - this way you will show the child that his choice has certain consequences, and he is responsible for them.

Engage your child. How to raise a child at 2 years old if he constantly shows his independence and wants to do everything himself? Make it beneficial for him: give him simple tasks and try to notice which ones he does most willingly and what he does best. At the age of 2 years, the child tries to imitate adults, so he will be happy to do the same things that mom or dad do. Water a flower with him, let him “help” in the kitchen, ask him to bring something while cleaning. Any such task should begin with the words “help me, please,” so that the child understands the meaning of his actions. Also, try to keep your child busy every day with educational games, creativity, and teach him something new.

Each child has an individual character formed from birth. Education must begin from a very early age so that the period of personality formation passes as easily as possible. Psychology gives a variety of advice regarding raising a 2-3 year old child. This is due to the fact that the child’s development should be harmonious and versatile. The behavior of a three-year-old child does not determine how he will grow up. It is determined by temperament, not corrected by character.

Until the age of 3, children do not demonstrate how well-mannered they are. Behavior consists of characteristics of temperament: personality formation occurs. The preferences and worldview of the baby change several times a day, which complicates the task of parents. The psychology of a child at 3 years old has its own characteristics:

In the third year of life, the greatest priority must be given to the child’s behavior in society.

Try to convey information to your child in the form of a game. Strict prohibitions negatively affect the educational process and can cause inappropriate behavior and hysterics. Follow a daily routine. Refrain from sorting things out with your spouse in the presence of children. They react negatively to such displays of emotion on the part of their parents.

The difference between boys and girls

After two years, children begin to realize their gender identity. Show off your differences with appropriate clothing. Sexual awareness occurs most quickly in children's groups. It is noticeable in the division of preschoolers into groups for communication.

The peculiarities of raising boys are that they need to be taught from an early age about the inadmissibility of fighting with girls, about the role of a protector and the future head of the family. The easiest way to explain this is if the father is an example for the son.

It is still too early for girls to develop special skills. Encourage their passion for trying on clothes and decorating. Girls often imitate their mothers and want to help with cleaning the house or cooking. Buy them themed sets of toys that imitate kitchen appliances and household appliances. This will allow the baby to try on the role of the mistress of the house at any time.

Features of organizing classes

In the age period of 2-3 years, it is necessary to work with the child in a variety of ways. At this time, education should be:

• aesthetic;
• moral;
• physical.

You have to instill in your baby the simplest self-service skills and give lessons in politeness. Three years is the optimal time for this.

The main mistake parents make is planning long, many-hour classes and trying to learn a lot of new things during them. A three-year-old needs only 10-15 minutes to gain new knowledge, after which he needs to change the type of activity.

If the baby is not in the mood to study, replace the lesson with reading, listening to music and watching educational films. The activity should be calm so that a change in the daily routine is not felt.

Psychologists recommend using sensory didactic games. They bring good results, developing the baby in several directions at once: they improve fine motor skills, improve imagination and teach them to build logical chains. An example of such a game is mosaic. First, lay out the patterns together, and then let the baby create a picture on his own.

Features of different temperaments

Often problems and disobedience arise due to the wrong approach to raising a child. If you do not take into account the individual characteristics of your child, you will very often encounter misunderstandings and hysterics. All people are divided into 4 groups according to the type of temperament, each baby develops it from birth. However, there are no ideal representatives of this or that group. The division occurs according to the principle of the predominance of traits characteristic of one of the temperaments.

The main task of parents is to form a character in the child that will smooth out temperamental deficiencies. An individual approach will allow you to do this as efficiently and gently as possible. Try to avoid direct and unfounded prohibitions.

Prohibitions: conscious and not

With a direct ban, any child of three years old will protest, but this educational moment cannot be completely avoided. By prohibiting, you set a “border” that cannot be crossed. Restrictions can be used to correct the child’s behavior in society and to protect him.

Parents often use prohibitions out of habit. In childhood, they were often limited themselves, and they consciously create boundaries for their child. Filter information and prohibit only what is really necessary.

Each limitation included in the educational process must be explained. He must have a clear reason that needs to be spoken. Talk about the consequences of breaking the ban. These should not be death threats, but constructive and logical conclusions. For example, in a situation where you refuse to buy your child ice cream: the reason will be weak immunity, the explanation will be frequent illnesses, and the consequences of the violation will be long-term treatment.

There is a group of irrational prohibitions that need to be excluded from the education process. Unconscious restrictions have reasons:

1. The principle “you - for me, I - for you”. The child behaved badly during a walk, for which the parents deprived him of sweets or did not buy a previously promised toy.
2. Envy. Beautiful clothes, delicious food and good toys - many children of the 90s were deprived of these benefits. Now they place restrictions on children without any reason that have no protective function or educational component.
3. Increased anxiety and excessive care. Most often, this reason pushes mothers into unconscious prohibitions. Women try to protect their firstborns and preschool children with poor health from everything. For this reason, many children do not communicate with peers, do not have a dog, a bicycle, a skateboard, etc. at home.

Bogdanova N.V.,
child psychologist, psychoanalyst

Crisis of two years

Most babies go through the age of “no” around the age of two. Even those children who were considered real little angels begin to look more like stubborn donkeys. How to respond to such changes in a child’s behavior? In what cases should you be firm, and in what cases is it better to give in?

You ask him to put on a sweater, sit down at the table, stop exploring the electrical outlet, or return the rattle to his eight-month-old brother - with childish tenacity, your child rejects any requests and demands.

“At the next “no,” I broke down, my patience ran out,” says Larisa, mother of two-year-old Philip. I only dreamed of the moment when he would finally go to bed and I would get a little respite.”

What is the reason for a child’s need to be stubborn? At about two years of age, the child begins to realize his integrity, both psychological and physical, he learns to control his natural functions and enjoys owning his body. During this period, he feels that he is no longer one with his mother, that he is a completely separate person. With the help of “no,” the baby over and over again asserts his very fresh sense of “separateness.” In order to psychologically separate from the parents, the child must resist them, resisting parental control, instructions and requests. Only by opposing himself to his parents can he take the path of individualization. Of course, sometimes it can be difficult to get along with a baby, but you need to remember that this crisis period precedes a new milestone in development. Therefore, it is important to understand how to help a child (and sometimes yourself) get through a crisis without impeding personal development.

Avoid obstacles

Let's put on socks? No, no socks needed! You should not be stubborn after your child. You will certainly be able to overrule him, but in fact, by submitting to you this time, he will not change his position. True, if you constantly give in, the baby may “overflow its banks”, turning into a little tyrant. Of course, it is important for a small child to show his will and feel that he is the one in control of the situation, but it is equally important to set boundaries so that he learns to balance his desires with the requirements of reality. In order to honorably get out of another conflict situation into which your child’s irreconcilable stubbornness has led you, you need to become a master of red herrings and lyrical digressions. For example, offer his fingers a game of hide and seek: would they like to hide in their socks so that no one will find them? Draw his attention to something that makes him feel positive: “Will your teddy bear go for a walk with us? He probably needs help getting ready?” Sometimes it is enough to wait five minutes and repeat your request again. Your child's attention will be focused elsewhere. Apply the same strategy if your child refuses to leave the playground: “Who can run to the corner of that house over there the fastest?” This is a good way to redirect your child's attention to something more fun, interesting or unusual. When a stubborn baby begins to obey, praise him, because for him this is an obvious effort.

If your child does not heed your request to sit down at the table or start getting ready for bed, if at least a quarter of an hour passes between your persuasion and his consent to action, reassure yourself that this is normal at his age. It is quite difficult for a small child to immediately respond to your request, especially if he is busy with something more interesting than purees or a nap. Put yourself in his shoes. Do you have a desire to interrupt a conversation with your beloved friend in order to go wash the dishes? Hardly at the same time. Maybe in ten minutes. For the child, just like for you, switching from one activity to another is easier and does not cause resistance if he knows about it in advance. “Slowly finish the game, we’ll have lunch in fifteen minutes.” If you are going to visit, announce the program to him and add some pleasant details: “We will go to grandma. She really wants to see you and treat you to pancakes.” When dressing your baby, tell him how you will get there, remind him about pancakes, ask how much he can eat: let’s count, with honey or jam? He won’t even notice that he’s already fully dressed and ready to go out.

Of course, there are things about which you need to remain steadfast. The child should know that there are prohibitions and rules that should never be broken. They should primarily be about safety and be very clear. You can’t stick your fingers into a socket, climb onto a windowsill, or snatch a pen from your mother’s hand in the middle of the roadway. When you ask your baby to remove his fingers from the socket, he must remove them. And if he says “no,” calmly take his hands away from his cherished goal; there can be no compromises here. The kid will probably try to defend his rights with screams and tears; try not to oppose your position to his, but to calm him down and explain once again what the ban is connected with.

From time to time, give your child the opportunity to say “no,” to show his will and express his desires. The child must know that it is he who wants or does not want something, and by accepting his “no” you will show respect for his needs. Why not allow your child to exercise freedom of choice where it does not threaten his safety and health? In addition, some balance will be maintained between what you can allow him and what you cannot.

At the table:“Should I put some cauliflower in for you?”
When selecting a game:“Do you want to play with the blocks?”
Offering him an extra glass of drink:“Would you like some more juice?”
Presenting him with a choice:“Which sweater do you want to wear, red or blue?”
Provide a choice in the expression of feelings:“Do you want to kiss your sister?”